Smosh Mess For Less Day of Hell: Wolfycat Assaulted By Custy Bitch

From Wolfycat:

Here at Smosh, we have four managers.

Two of them are the coolest, awesomest, We-don't-take-no-shit Managers.

The other two are eeeeeevil Managers.

This week has just made me go "D'oh!"

I was in fitting room again, and earlier that day, a Business Lady had come in to shop on her lunch break.

She left two pantsuits on hold with me and firmly assured me that she was coming back after six to get them.

I would still be working then, so I put her info and the date on the slip, stuck it to her stuff, and hung it on the end of the rack by the wall where I couldn't lose it.

Wrong.

6:30PM rolls around and Business Lady is there to pick up her stuff.

I hop over to the spot on the rack by the wall and the two pantsuits are gone! I rummaged through the rest of the rack.

Nada. I'm wondering, did some other business attire wearing custy swipe them when I had my back turned?

Then I notice a bunch of other holds I had done earlier are also missing. I check, and they're not on my sorting racks, either.

I called up the manager's office where Barbs was. I asked if she had maybe checked up on fitting rooms earlier.

Barbs: Oh, yeah. A bunch of those holds had the wrong date. You aren't supposed to mark it as tomorrow. It's against policy.

Me:...Huh??

Barbs: *huge sigh* Today is the 11th. Marking it for the 12th is not allowed. You should know that.

Me: Barbs...today is Tuesday...the 12th.

Barbs: *another sigh* Today is the 11th. I am not going to argue with you.

Me: *pulls out cell, checks calendar, notes the big honking 12 indicated as TODAY*

By this time, Nice Manager #1 by the name of Cam walks by. I ask him today's date and he says "'Tis the twelfth day in the month of October" (no kidding, that actually happened).

Me: *on the phone* As today is indeed the 12th, there is a lady waiting here who had put on hold two pantsuits earlier today and is here to pick them up.

Barbs: *yet another sigh* What do you want me to do?

Me: Well, can you tell me what you did with all those holds?

Barbs: I put them back on the floor.

*cue agonized look on my face*

FFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU--!!!!

I turned to Business Lady and apologized. "I'm sorry, ma'am, there was a mistake and someone put your items back on the floor. I can get someone to help you find them again if you want."

"WHAT??? When I put something on hold here, I expect it to be HERE when I come back! Is that too much to ask for?!"

Great. Yes, yell at me because that feels aaaaawesome.

Cam picks up on what happened and offers to go fetch the items, assuming Barbs put them in the right section.

5 minutes later, he comes back with items in hand. Business Lady leaves. All is good for the moment. Then he goes to the phone and dials the office. Barbs answers with a huge sigh, and then he picks up the receiver. His side of the conversation went like:

Cam: Hey, what's up?...Is anything wrong?...What was wrong with the holds in fitting rooms?...Naw, it's the 12th!...Yeah!...No, I'm not kidding, I had to chase down pantsuits!

He hangs up shaking his head. "She's been on the computer for most of the day. she seriously didn't know what day it was."

And then later on as I'm about to clock out, Bob blocks me from getting to the computer and plays a game of 20 questions.

Bob: Haven't you already taken a lunch today?

Me: Yes, but I'm clocking out now.

Bob: You know you don't clock out for a break?

Me: I'm going home. (thinking: "can't you see my purse and lunchbox?")

Bob: No you aren't, you're closing today.

Me: Umm....no. I've been here since 10. I have a test to study for tomorrow.

Bob: We really need someone to help close tonight.

Me: I am going to clock out now.

Bob: Have you done your sizing area?

Me: *about to bite*

Supervisor: BOB! Really, dude, move. She's going home.

I've had enough, so I just went to an empty register and clocked out there. HASTA LA VISTA, BEBEH!

And then on Thursday, I was picked to tidy up women's shoes because bitches just decided throwing them at the floor, stuffing their diseased feet into them, and then kicking them under the shelves was SO ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT.

Then, as I'm tidying up sizes 9-12 (seriously, EVERYTHING WAS ON THE FLOOR), I hear giggly teens in the size 7 aisle chanting the word PENIS. Like, four girls were taking turns saying it, building up the volume a bit more each time. I make my way to that aisle just as the purple-haired chick all out bellows "PEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNIIIIIIIIISSSSSS!!!"

"HEY!" I scolded. "Watch your language--" ZOOOM. Those girls couldn't have high-tailed it out of there fast enough. Pretty much everyone at the registers had heard and glared at them as they left.

Then today (Friday), Everyone was completely insane.

This one lady came up to me and yelled: "YOU MAKE A CRAPPY JOB AT MAKING CLOTHES! THIS THREAD COUNT IS SHITTY!"

I don't make the clothes, I just sell them.

"THEN TELL WHOEVER MADE THIS SHIT TO QUIT THEIR DAY JOB!!!"

You want me to tell Calvin Klein to quit his day job?? OK, but he's not gonna be too happy...

Then there was Psycho Rage Bitch who came in about a half hour before closing.

She had loaded her cart with a couple heavy boxes of dishes and silverware and a bunch of other random shit. I was finishing up sizing Dress World.

I was huddled right up to the rack so that people could pass me with plenty of room. I then had to get to the next aisle, so I peeked around the corner.

Everything was clear. PRB had her cart there and was looking at shirts, so I stepped out and WHAM!

All of a sudden PRB is trying to force her cart into my ribs. One of the wheels jumps up on my foot.

PRB: *raging* Watch where you're going!

Me: OWOWOWOW! Holyshitgetyourfuckingcartoffme!

PRB: *super raging* WHAT DID YOU SAY?!?!

I pushed her cart forcibly away from me, but she was pushing back and my foot was still trapped.

PRB looked like she was possessed or something and she could jump over the cart and bite my face off.

I grab hold of the cart and lift it off of my foot.

I back up and she makes like a ram and pushes her cart into my hip.

At this point, I completely lose it. I grab the end of the cart, yank it away from her, and push it off down the center aisle.

Me: What the fuck is your problem?!

PRB: You can't talk to me like that!

Me: The hell I can when you try to run me down on purpose!

At this point Race (LP guy) races up and gets between us.

"You need to leave." he says to PRB.

"I WANT TO TALK TO YOUR MANAGER!" PRB yells.

Cam jogs up to us from the back.

"You assaulted an employee. Either leave now or I can call you a police escort."

Bitch walked out bitching about how our store sucks and whatnot.

I now have a swollen and bruised foot, and my hip looks like I really enjoy BDSM.

My boyfriend didn't believe me when I told him about my day and I don't blame him.

I never want to do that again.

--Wolfycat

Comments

[Redheadactress]

OMG dear Wolfycat! I know the pain. Someone almost did this to me. I am so glad I got out of that crazy mess. Please take care of yourself. And I would press charges, especially if you end up getting out of work because of it. What a bitch. Where you live? I can come and kick their ass for you!

[Ado]

So.....normal week in retail then?

Nah, seriously, the fact that you didn't put that bitch on her arse is saying that your are a really nice person. Anyone else....

[Skittles]

Psycho Raging Bitch is just further proof that breeding has been abused and should no longer be a right, but a privilege.

[Sailor Blue]

That really sucks, and i would have had the urge to push it hard enough to slam into her.

Somehow it reminds me of a time when my former cool head manager was putting out halloween stuff for the store and the cart he was using accidentally tapped this lady. It didn't slam into her or anything, just rolled into her for a second. She fell on the floor and pretended like she was dying, then came to the registers and said, "since your manager ran over me, i would like to receive my purchase 50% off today". When we couldn't do that (and the manager had left for lunch), she left in a huffnpuff fit.

[Token Female]

D8!!! Ow ow ow ow! So not cool! That lady deserves to be tossed into jail for assault and battery, especially considering you have bruises. I really wish your manager had called the cops on her ass.

I hope the pain goes away soon, at the very least :(

[Abra]

I seriously do NOT understand why y'all don't file assault charges when shit like this happens. That is what the law is THERE FOR. You are well within your rights to file both a criminal complaint and/or a civil suit ($$$$). If they're going to bring the pain, SO SHOULD YOU. Otherwise, they'll just keep on assaulting random retail slaves. This sort of thing should be discouraged to the full extent of the law. I'm seeing more and more stories like this lately. Stand up for yourselves, goddammit! Call the cops yourselves! You don't even need your manager to back you up if the altercation was caught on tape by the security cameras - the footage can and will be subpoenad.

This makes me sooooo angry for you. Wish I were a lawyer, I'd love to take on cases like this.

[Psyche]

I have been to one of your stores, and I must say that, regarding the lady who screamed at you about the poor quality of the clothing doesn't suprise me.

Smosh is seen as-at least in Florida, where I live-the type of place frequented by old ladies looking for a bargain on outdated, ugly clothing. Who then complain about it.

[trekkiebabe31]

Ow, I hope you feel better soon! I had two similar occurances the other day, got backed into an endcap by a custy who was backing up without looking behind him, plus was trying to put stuff back when this lady zooms around the corner and slams her cart into mine then glares at me before taking off again.

[ServiceStationSlave]

I think any of us retail slaves are forced to enjoy some part of bdsm :)

[LeashHater]

I HATE when managers tell you you have to stay past the scheduled end of your shift like their word is gospel. I'm pretty sure that is something that I need to agree upon.

[Tarat]

@LeashHater

I wish managers would realize that many of us retailslaves are also college students that are struggling to keep their grades up.

I've managers get piss at me when I couldn't stay past my shift b/c I had some serious studying to do.

I also had a DM threaten to fire anyone who didn't stay to help do inventory. I had an 8AM class the next day but I ended up staying until 2AMish because I'm so damn nice and she's so damn scary.

[Pagemaster]

Similar "On hold but taken by manager" story:

I was calling up a customers hold and had to use a phone one register away from my till(every other register had a phone. I was on one that didn't) but got a customer before I could finish dialing and went to help them as a small line formed.

Finished the line and called the slip number and left a message..reached up to grab the book and it was gone. I didn't see anyone buy it, touch it or fondle it in a bad bad way. I searched around, asked another worker who was close by if he moved it. And started to panic.

Finally I called my manager who told me to tell her the title..."Oh yeah I saw it sitting on the register and took it. It's here. Let me bring it back...it's a good thing you didn't sell it because I'd have made you call her back and tell her you sold her book."

As if it where necessary to even say that at all, like she where threatening or punishing me for her having taken it off the desk :/ I was almost crying looking for that book all over my till..

[Wolfycat]

At the moment, I was kinda scared to death. Then after the fact I was all "WTF? I shoulda cut that bitch!"
Blah. If that bitch comes in again, people better clear the aisles. And I'll recognize her, because she's one ugly mofo.

[NC Tony]

This is why we should be allowed to carry tazers.

[Humor_Me]

Sorry, Tony, but I think cattle prods would be better. That way they would feel the pain every time you zapped them. >:-D

[Lotus Petal]

@ NC Tony: Or pepper spray. >:3

[Wolfycat]

My boyfriend wants to get me one of those mini pistols. I'm like "Are you trying to get me arrested?"

[ServiceStationSlave]

I would just say for the record I feel REALLY sorry for the Smosh slaves in the bedding section. I have never seen a pillow section I could walk down at any of their stores. I am always nice to the Smosh Slaves. One time, I bought a bedding set that was on clearance, missing, like, one circle pillow sham. It's a normally $60 or so set at Smosh, but they couldn't get it to scan, so they gave it to me for $8.

[Triple C]

I've been hit with so many carts, that it doesn't even hurt anymore. Except working in the liquor store, I've been squatting to open boxes of wine to restock and a dude hit me with the carriage. Knocked me over, but scared the crap out of him. He was actually a pretty cool apologizing and such.

How come when I hit people with carriages they flip out and act hurt? But when we get hit, they expect us to be used to it?