Greedy Discount Rat Gets Told

BookAce gets a Retail Balls for not giving in to a rude, greedy custy:

Good gods RHUers...is it just me, or did someone dump a dose of bitchiness on customers this week??

I had a discount rat today afflicted with the very unfortunate selective-reading disorder. She could read the "40% off one item" line on her coupon just fine, but was entirely unable to read the rules and conditions for the coupon. So sad, this plague. Perhaps a selective-reading disorder cure fund should be established.

I got her almost right after being bitched at for a website issue (which nobody in our store controls) and for how crappy our service line is (I have no control over how long you're on hold!), AND after ten people in a row refused a members card, meaning that my percentage for today is shot to hell and I'm going to get yelled at about it later.

So I was not in the mood for discount rat shit. She comes up with a book worth $35 and three other things, all $2.99 each, then flings a coupon at me. This coupon, as most, has a paragraph of tiny print. Is it fair that companies hide their rules in tiny print? No. But that doesn't change the fact that they DO, and they're typed there on the page and legally binding.

Custy wants the coupon on the $35 book, of course. This is fine. I ring it up and then she flings another 40% coupon at me and wants me to use it on another thing. And for a nice customer, honestly, I would have used it.

But discount rat custy ignored my kindly "Hi, how are you today?" greeting, has not used 'please' or 'thank you' once, very impolitely snarled at me about not wanting the member card, and has thrown the coupons at me rather than handing them nicely. Now she wants me to break the rules.

Fine by me. Two can play the hardass game. >)

I put on my shit-eating smile and say, "Ma'am, you can only use one coupon per transaction."

Custy: "It says off one item. Use it on another item."

Me: (What's this? Still incapable of saying please?) "I can't." *I point to where it says One Coupon Per Customer on the coupon*

Custy: "I find this hard to understand."

Me: "It says right here on the coupon that you can only use one coupon. I used the first one on this book. I cannot use this second one."

Custy: "I just don't understand."

Me: *holding the coupon out and underlining the words with my nail as I read them aloud*

"One coupon per customer per transaction only."

Custy: *huffs, but stays silent*

I give her the total. She then says, "how much was the hardcover with the discount?"

Me: "$21."

Custy: "The book was already 30% off. Why didn't I get that too."

Me: "We can't combine discounts. The computer physically will not let us." (And fuck, even if it did, like I'd seriously give YOU 70% off??)

Custy: *starts huffing and puffing again* "I don't understand."

Me: "It's the rule."

Custy: "So I get no discount at all?"

Me: "No, you got the 40%. You have to pick one or the other, so I gave you the 40."

Custy: *stares at me huffily*

Me: (Hahaha, don't even bother! You're fucking with the wrong associate, lady.) I hold out the coupon again and read off to her, "This coupon cannot be combined with other coupon or in-store discounts."

Custy: *sniffs* "I just find that very hard to follow."

Me: "Mm hm. Your total is $XX.XX. Do you need a bag?"

Custy: *glares, but leaves without another word*

Amusingly, she left her second 40% coupon. I gave it to a nice customer later on.

To top it off, a custy went back into our break room, opened the brand-new tin of Christmas cookies I brought in for my co-workers, and stole one. Then she walked around the store with it and dropped crumbs everywhere. WTF.

Hang in there retail slaves. I wish you guys happy holidays and a new year full of polite customers who can actually read their entire coupons! (I can dream...)

--BookAce

 

Comments

[righteothen]

Stealing food is on my top crimes list. That person would have been hunted down (literally, and figuratively).

[Burger Bitch]

I would gladly donate to that fund.
If only there was a cure.

[cashykat]

Yeah I had a prima donna wic girl who didn't understand the printed wic rules today. "What I can't get 9oz of cereal but I'll always gotten it!". Well they changed that a year ago see here in red font about cereal being over 12oz? She huffs, growls and whines and goes and grabs a 12.8 box of cheerios from the shelf.
Which started another problem, you can't get more than 36 ounces in the wic check and she already had a 24oz box of cereal. I told her she can't get that 12.8oz box of cheerios which resulted in more huffing, whining, and growling and threats of never returning to my store.
I must have had red glares in my eyes by then but I didn't respond to her huffing, whining and growling. The next woman in line said I did well with her. I kinda laughed and said that girl was a prima donna anyway.

And eww I so wouldn't have eaten those cookies a nasty crusty stole.

[CiCi]

1)"So sad, this plague. Perhaps a selective-reading disorder cure fund should be established." Preach!
2) The custy who stole your cookies must be entitled to the max. We've had people wander into our back room and "shop," and a lady who used our bathroom (when we have a customer bathroom). But seriously? Helping yourself to employees' cookies in an area where you're NOT SUPPOSED TO BE? OMGWTFBBQ!!!

[kerryqueen]

Oh dear Lord. I wonder when people will get it through their heads that KINDNESS GOES A LONG WAY. I can say it five hundred different ways ("You'll catch more flies with honey..." "Treat people how you'd like to be treated..." "Pretend that girl behind the counter is your own daughter..." "Kill 'em with kindness!" and so on and so forth) but people will NEVER understand. You're polite, courteous, and willing to accept the rules? I'll bend them for you if I can. You're an asshole from the start and think slinging insults will make it better? I'll stand by those rules like my life depends on it. Why would I EVER stick my neck out for someone who thinks (or at least speaks to me like they think) I'm worthless? It's so simple. So very simple, yet very few people understand.

[Ado]

Crusty went into the staff room and stole your fucking cookies, WTF??

I had a drunk crusty one busy night come around the bar and try to serve people. The kindness was there, but the thinking was not.

[Tina]

I do believe that the cure for selective reading would be NC Tonys clue by four previously mentioned. No funds or nothing like that, just a thump on the head. Problem solved.

[Kunoichi Cook]

Aww, the "One Coupon per custy" vs. "One coupon per transaction". That reminds me of my retail days. If the custy was nice to me, I would suggest splitting their purchase into two transactions so they could use both coupons (if it was a "one coupon per transaction" sort of thing) but if they were nasty, I would keep my mouth shut.

[Pony Hustler]

What the hell? How did a custy even find/get into your break room? SMH...

[me]

I had a patron come right back into the workroom in the library, where our nice large clerk proceeded to boot him but good. He was also my library stalker, looking for me. Thankfully I was in the kitchen out of sight. And double thankfully I was transferred to another branch not long after.

[anon]

Oh god, the EBT people complaining that the gas station lets them get Monster drinks on their card, so why can't we??? We are not the gas station which probably doesn't even let you anyway, I don't know why you're expecting an associate to just magically change how the EBT program works, gah!