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Bullseye's #1 C*NT

Very nice list. I am loathe to say the following, however, but I just want to put in that not all the morbidly obese who must use carts and buy junk food are buying it for themselves, nor is it the reason for all of them.
Case in point, my mother. She is morbidly obese because of an inability to exercise due to hip and knee injury in a car crash when I was eight and a faulty thyroid. I have never, ever seen her over eat, and we rarely kept junk food in the house. She is over 400 pounds and rarely leaves the house because she is in so much pain walking. When she does leave the house I go with her and she uses the motorized carts. In return for me helping her shop, she buys me some junk that I am too poor to buy myself. We always get bad looks from the cashiers and other customers when she comes through and the first few things on the conveyor are twinkies and a 24 pack of candy bars. (I myself am a very small, very muscular woman, and use the candy as dessert twice a week.) It sickens me that there are idiot people who perpetuate the stereotype that all morbidly obese people got themselves that way, and it really bothers me the way people treat my mom when they see her using the motorized carts, even if they watch her struggle into the store using a cane and wearing ankle, knee, and hip braces.

Grendus the Self Check Guy

Preach it. Seriously, going down the list:

1. Granted, I work in a hellmart in a very low end part of town. We get a lot of hispanics using cards that they probably bought from drug addicts, a lot of african americans buying two carts full of groceries on EBT, but EBT users are both the worst at budgeting and the most entitled people I've ever served.

2. Not as big a problem for me, I guess. I did have one lady who spent an hour and a half yelling at her bratty hellspawn after I repeatedly asked her to put her bags in her cart. She then gave me a deathglare when I asked her kids to behave and they listened to me (what can I say, I'm good with kids).

3. Doesn't help that hellmart's official policy is "go ahead and adjust the price". I get yelled at a lot for refusing to adjust blu-ray movies in the $5 DVD bin. Hey dipshit, it says $5 DVD's. New release blu-ray's are not $5. Heck, the actual $5 DVD's are oldies and spanish movies. It's not a great deal. We're dumping old stock.

4. Coupons aren't usually a problem for me, I guess (except on the self check, because for some unknown reason they thought using a weight sensor to see if they put the coupon in was a good idea). Just say the system literally refuses to accept the coupon and there's nothing you can do. 90% of the time they let it drop.

5. Say it with me... WIC. SUCKS! Worse, people don't realize it has to be done first (usually the father, or a hispanic who bought a WIC card from a drug addict), which means you have to go back and manually void the transaction or wait for a CSM (good luck).

I'm sorry, side mini-rant here. Why can't we suspend and void out transactions on our own registers? Is that a security issue? Really now? Then why can we do it on the self checks?

6. Make it 95%. And then when someone who actually needs a motorized cart comes in, they have to wait because you were afraid of getting any exercise.

7. No comment. I avoid corporate like the plague.

8. I dunno, my CSM's are pretty good. Badly overworked though, getting help is like pulling teeth. Some days I get to work, look at all the flashing lights, and think of Peggy from the credit card commercials ("So pretty"). I never see them slacking off, it just takes a lot of time for them to get from fire to fire, and crusties come faster than the two or three CSM's can get them cleared out.

9. I despise complainers. I understand if someone does something flagrantly wrong, like a racial slur, sexual harassment, or violence. But complaining because I'm in a bad mood and told you I couldn't care less about your cancer inducing shit sticks (my exact words were "I'm sorry, I avoid tobacco products like the plague, so you're going to have to point them out to me") is just being an asshole. Complaining because I told you, quite reasonably, that the turkey drumsticks are not on sale because they would have a "poultry reduced" sticker, regardless of whether you got them off of a reduced rack, doesn't help you, all it does is piss off my manager (and I'm still not going to adjust it, you jackass).

What's worse, getting the managers to tell you what the actual complaint was is almost impossible. "Grendus, why am I getting complaints about you?" "I dunno, what are the complaints?" "I... can't remember. So why were they complaining?" Well I don't know, I work night shift, pretty much every custy who comes through here is already pissed because either they have to shop at night or because you're too fucking cheap to hire enough people to run more than the self check so they have to self check $400 of ramen. Everybody is pissed, nobody sticks out. The only people more pissed than the custys are the employees.

I suspect my first actual submission will be either me ragequitting or me explaining why I drove halfway to work, turned around, and called in to say I quit. Good job having the sense to get out of there.

Kunoichi Cook

@Bullseye: I think she was just trying to rant. I say some derogatory things here too, but I don't really mean them.

Queer Geek

They don't call it Hell-Mart for nothin'!

The Dukenator

You cannot buy certain items like alcohol with an EBT. Even the grocery store here has a sign that reads: Energy drinks cannot be purchased with an EBT. But I wonder how many tried, though.

Abusing your EBT card gets you in deep shit. You may end up getting a ban from receiving those benefits for a certain time.

Timekeeper's Twit

I'm on WIC... but I try to be good about it! I always always go off the booklet provided and/or the coupons, I do the math to make sure I am in the right price range, and item range. I even separate the items on the belt by coupon and stick the corresponding coupon on top of the items. Since I don't drive I am usually with my husband and we tend to do all of our shopping at once, we also separate all the items we are paying for and make sure to tell the clerk what's what. They're generally pretty nice about it.

WIC has been very helpful for me and my family. I don't want to abuse it. But I know some people are greedy assholes...

Grocery Slave

I deal with the EBT people all day and they are the most entitled people ever! I have seen them bitch out many other slaves (myself included) over 10 cents on a price. The WIC ladies are some of the nicest people I meet (except for one who bitched out my CSM over some baby formula we didnt have and said "This is why I dont shop here!"....while she had over 300 bux of other crap. I really dont like to judge bc we all could use a little help sometimes but when I see these crustys buying 300 bux of predominantly junk food through ebt, used whatever cash they had on cheapass booze then ask for 3 packs of cigs like nothing....I'm like REALLY?!

I get complained on bc I'm not shitting sunshine and ice cream as I ring up their bloody packs of mock tender steak and organ meat that should have been tossed and not eaten. I'm sorry...but 4 hours of people yelling at me over shit I cant control is not my idea of fun!

EnglishSlave

I worked at HellMart for a month before walking out. Reasons:
1. I requested NOT to be put on as a cashier, yet that was the FIRST place they put me, promising me that I would be "moved" to another section after training.
2. The training manual said that I would "observe" a cashier for two days, then have them as my backup until I felt comfortable being on my own, since I'd never done WIC or coupons before. I was given one day of training before being put on a register alone.
3. My first day on the register was the day the dorms OPENED in a college town. WTF? Lines out the door, parents and spoiled brats screaming at me about why we're out of everything and anything.
4. The final straw. I was in college and had a set schedule. 3PM to 11PM every night except weekends, because I had classes starting at 9AM and going till 1PM. There were nights I seriously didn't leave until 2AM because the CSM wouldn't allow me to cut my light out w/customers in line. WTF? If it's on, then MORE people are going to show up so I'll never leave asshat! Also, I somehow didn't see an increase in pay despite working over my hours, and I was getting yelled at by the manager for going over my hours.
After a month, I walked in, collected my final paycheck, handed the CSM my vest of doom, and walked out, never to return. While the pay was good for me at the time, my sanity and self-worth meant more. I've never regretted that decision.

Adam Hawthorne

I think that I love you after reading this !

MA_Nightmare

1. My mother-in-law has an EBT card, but she's always on top of the balance. I mean, she's an old bat who can't remember where her keys are half the time, but she can keep up with that - why the hell can't a normal person?
2. I think parents should be kicked out of the store for letting their kids run wild. There are a few stores that do it, but sadly, corporate outfits won't because it might dip into their precious profits.
3. I HATE people who bitch about "sale" things. At the Bullseye, if we left a sign out past the sale date, the person who noticed it got the sale price and that was it. Usually, I'd have the next person in line bitching that they had to pay full price. >.>
4. Not only do custys not read the fine print, they also wait until you've finished ringing up everything and they've run their payment before telling you. "Oh, by the way, I have 342597 coupons I want to use." -violently bashes head against register-
5. Either read your stuff and know what you need or don't bother wasting our tax dollars. The only thing worse than stupid custys with WIC vouchers they don't know how to use is cashiers who go herp-a-derp when they see them.
6. Aforementioned old bat MIL loves to use these, even though she's more than capable of walking on her own - and she's not morbidly obese. I take every opportunity to remind her that she doesn't need one and is keeping someone who really needs one from using it.
7. Corporate assholes need to take one day a month to actually work IN the stores they oversee. Maybe they'd get it, but I imagine they'd all just call in sick that day. >.<
8. Don't I know it! I never worked for the Mart, but any time I needed a front-end manager, they took their sweet-ass time. And yes, I complain every time - not about the cashier, of course.
9. If cashiers and the like were paid better, we'd have no problem smiling. However, when you can't afford your rent and you're forced to do double the work for half the pay, there's no way in hell you're going to be cheery. Simple as that.

Thank you for this post - people need to get with the program.

buffalobabe

Lots of classism, racism, and fat phobia in this post/comments! I understand that people need to rant, but this is not the way to go about it. Reverting to stereotypes is weak!

Malmart Peon

I've been at Walmart for almost three years. Thankfully I work at one that is located in a college town, so most of the employees are reasonably intelligent. I'm sorry that you've had bad luck with CSMs. There are a couple that are lazy at my Walmart, but the root of (my problem, at least) is scheduling. When there are two CSMs for the front end things like change orders or price checks can take sooooooo long.

The EBT thing pisses me off. THERE IS NO TAX ON YOUR FOOD. BRING A FUCKING CALCULATOR. CALL OR VISIT THE WEBSITE BEFORE YOU GO SHOPPING. I was on the self-checks covering a lunch and a woman approached me. She wanted me to check the balance on her card. I informed her that if she purchased something I would be more than happy to, as that is the only way we know what the balance is. She refused and asked if the service desk could do anything. I replied that they might be able to let her use their phone, but it was unlikely because they weren't really supposed to. I apologized (even though it was clearly NOT my fault she can't be bothered to check before she shops) and wished her a good day. She turned around and said that Walmart used to be more helpful and she certainly would NOT have a good day. Whatever lady, I couldn't care less.

Fuck, I have a link card (for the whole $30 I get, when my coworker can decide that she wants to live somewhere with security and without roommates and get $200--best way to cut costs is live with others. I live in the cheapest place I could find with my fiancee and my brother and I'm trying to get another job and she can't be bothered to work more than 20 hours a week. Pisses me off) and I bring a calculator to shop with me. IT IS NOT HARD. STOP BEING LAZY.

Callista

There's a phone number you can call to get your balance. It's on the back of the card. There really is no excuse...

A lot of these folks who have $300 on their card are probably feeding a family of five for a month, doing all their shopping at once. And junk food is more calories per dollar than anything else you can buy.

I'm on EBT and get $89 per month to buy food with; so it really is a narrow squeeze sometimes to buy enough food. Add to that the problem of being disabled and not having the ability to cook complex things... I can't get past the complexity of spaghetti even on a good day, and then I have to use a timer on the stove or else I will leave the pot there until it burns. So that's another limitation--many of the cheaper things are relatively complex. I ruin more rice than I manage to cook to edibility.

I often do end up not being able to buy the good, fresh food I would really like to buy because there just isn't enough money to stretch all the way. Summers, most of the time, I can afford produce; but right now it's winter and I'm mostly living on canned soup.

So yeah, EBT and junk food... it's more complicated than it might seem. Junk fills you up for less money and is also quicker and easier to prepare if you are disabled and have problems cooking. It's not as healthy, but it's better than being hungry.

Anon

I find it amusing how, on this site, "cuntplunger" is an appropriate epithet and yet, somehow, "obese" (a legitimate medical descriptive) is considered offensive.

King Cash of Hellmarts

Hey Im 19 and I work at one of these Hellmarts. If it wasn't for the fucking credit card shit, I would probably be not as angry. They took all the Walmart brand sodas and stuck a sticker on them that reads "If a Walmart cashier does not ask for a Walmart credit card, you can take this soda free of charge." Then if a cashier gets 3 sodas taken away they get coached. Some fucking pricks even go as low as lying to the CSM.

I like my CSMs for the most part. Almost all the female ones are pregnant and angry as fuck. The one that is not pregnant is just a bitch in general. The two male CSMs are for the most part cool. They have to run around like chickens with their heads chopped off. When there is only two cashiers on a Saturday and they have a self checkout and a two lines backed up all the way to Jersey Shore, they can certainly be frustrating to work with. Not my fault my Hellmart only has a maximum of three cashiers working the front end on the three busiest days of the week.( Friday Saturday and Sunday).

Cant wait to rage quit from this place. Its been coming on for a couple of weeks now and I sure as hell ready for a break. Especially a good ol' weekend off. Ive been working at Hellmart for almost 5 months and had to call out sick to get a fucking day off on the weekend. They seriously work the shit out of you.

Carrie

I am so glad I found this, I really wasn't sure that others felt the same way. I have put up with Hell-Mart for over 9 years now. I have seen so many wrong things and heard so many lies and been told so many lies. I am not sure why I have stayed. My friends there always end up talking me into staying and where I live there isn't many job choices. All that is going to change this fall when my apartment lease ends...then I am going to quit Hell-Mart. The straw that broke the camels back was yesterday when I was locked out of the register because I had to clock out before my 6 hours. Well the ignorant CSM sent her only spare cashier to give someone a break instead of sending them to me who clearly needed relieved first. I had to literally holler at her to come over to my register to show her that I was locked out (I had already previously warned her about this). She then signed onto the register and told me work on her numbers to finish checking my customers out! I told her that if I did that I would go over my 6 hours and get in trouble. She told me that I wouldn't, and I told her that I didn't feel right about it. She then told me in a snotty voice to 'just leave then!' I have never been so angry at my job before, so depressed and frusterated...and even hurt. This same CSM a few weeks before had told me in the break room she would pray for me because I told her I don't and won't wear religious jewelry. I asked her why she would need to pray for me...she said because it is hot in the afterlife. Basically she said that I am going to hell because I refuse to wear religious jewely.
This is just a small taste of what I have encountered during my time working there. But I have come to a point where I can no longer deal with it, I want out of this hell before it completely devours me.
After all the years I finally am seeing the light. I mean, I knew the light was there, but I didn't look at it. Now, I have made a promise to myself and that is to not be abused by this uncaring retail giant any longer. I am literally going to count the days on the calender until I am free of this Hell I have been in.
Thanks for making me feel better!

Eraser Head

Join the club!!!
www.iworkatpencils.blogspot.com

MareBear

I am training to be a cashier. This is my first job and i have not had any cashier experience. As soon as i got to the front end being taught with the registers there were so many things i did not know i had to know. I felt so bad because i felt like i was annoying the customers and the cashier training me. I started 5 days ago and i still feel the need to be trained. They need to have a cheat sheet for this stuff because its so confusing. I feel so burdensome when im placed out in the front end with a cashier to train me. I cant quit because it took me a year and a half to get this job. Also if i quit i wont be doing too good financially because my husband said i should not quit or he wont be happy and my in-laws are counting on me because they cant keep helping my husband and i out when we are struggling. I feel so bad feeling like such a newbie. i go back to work tomorrow. 9-4 mainly cbls annd training (which i would feel bad if i asked if i could be trained again until i feel comfortable doing things myself.) im literally scared to go back. i do not do well under pressure but i need the job. =/ The only things im confused about are those damned produce codes and the different buttons you have to press. grrr

Sad Sales Assoc.

Art Rat: Oh you don't have to apologize, that was a terrific rant! I work at Walmart and I recognize so much of my own experiences in yours and of other people commenting here.

I have to work weekends and sometimes I just want to cry, it's so bad there. Swarms of people come in on the weekends, just about the rudest customers around. None of them pay attention to where they're going with their carts. I'm kneeling on the floor trying to zone areas that look like a tornado just went through it and these zombies come through, smashing their carts into my back because they were too busy staring, with their mouths hanging open, at all the shiny things sitting on the shelves to pay attention to the sales associate trying to do their job. I'll cry "Ouch!" loudly and the customers don't say a word, they just stare at me as though it were my fault and go off in search of more crap that they don't really need. No apologies, nothing. Sometimes I just have to go off to the restroom and cry, the frustration's so terrible.

You're treated like dirt by the customers, they hit you with their carts, call you stupid and useless because corporate decided to delete an item and you're not told why so you can't tell the customer why. They want their items NOW DAMNIT and they don't care how unreasonable they look or sound, or how badly they make the sales associate feel. How would they like it if people came into their work and treated them like that?

And I hate the person who decided it was a good idea to put a McDonald's inside of a Walmart. I've lost count of how many times I've had to clean up coffee spills, orange juice spills, discarded hamburger wrappers and french fries strewn all over the sales floor. I mean, god forbid people should go one hour of shopping without cramming even more food into their mouths. And hey mom, you wouldn't let your toddler hold a giant cup of water or orange juice at home, would you? What makes you think it's okay to do that at Walmart? Oh okay, I guess because YOU don't have to clean it up then YOU don't care that it's a bad idea. And apparently you have no problem with changing your baby's diaper right in the middle of an aisle and leaving the dirty diaper on a shelf next to merchandise.

The overwhelming majority of customers who shop at Walmart are just the meanest, nastiest, rudest people I've ever encountered anywhere. A few, a very tiny few are nice. I remember one time I was trying to stock the shelves with all the tons of merch that the overnight crew couldn't be bothered to work. I was kneeling on the floor (again), sweaty, tired and frustrated as usual and some sweet old lady walked by me with her cart (she didn't crash into me, yay!), patted me on the back, smiled and said so nicely, "The day's almost over, hang in there." I wanted to cry and give her a big hug, it was the nicest thing anyone ever said to me at Walmart.

Slave associate

I unfortunately work for hellmart, I've been there for 2 yrs and let me tell you each day it gets worse and worse. I'm a sales(slave) associate. You have get delegated so much work that it is impossible for you to finish and they don't care. If I have to zone my area and I have a swarm of custys forget it. They come and throw everything on the floor, and they see you're organizing everything they don't care. Custys are the worse ever, they are rude assholes and management always sides with them no matter what. Instead of having your associate's back they take the custys side. I'm to the point of putting in my two weeks notice because it's not worth it to deteriorate your health over this place. I just have an asshole custy curse me out because there were shoes in the clearance that didn't belong there. To that and all other rude custys fuck you!!!!!! We work hard here so go fuck yourself !! I hate you all!!!

divinesynder

You see so many things on facebook about liking walmart but never anything about hating it. I've been with walmart for almost 7 years and I seriously hate it more and more each day. They never give enough time to do my job and then they expect to stay late and get it done. Not only do I have to my job but I have to do someone else's.

I despise the managers that you have to catch on a good day. If you're in a management position you should be approachable for everyone. Sometimes I think managers forget what its like to be on the salesfloor regularly.

I'm almost 30 years old and I'm already starting to have back problems and being exhausted all the damn time. The only reason I stay at walmart is because I'm afriad I can't get a job that would pay me better. I can't afford to be without a job.

I think the things that piss me off the most is when a manager tells you that something is policy but then they go ahead and do the opposite. Asking to tell a customer they can't have something for whatever reason and then giving it to them in front of me just makes me look like an idiot.

Thank you for this rant. I loved it!

John do

I currently work at a Wal Mart as a ICS associate. I started off as a cashier then was moved to the sales floor. All i gotta say is, please kill me now before I have to waste another day in this shit hole. They work you like slaves for shit pay while the fat fuck managers just bitch in their offices. I skipped work today, didnt even bother to call. I hope they fire me.

Rachel

I couldn't handle that place anymore. Working there for 2 months. Some obese man on a scooter called me a bitch for accidentally getting I'm his way. And we don't have a head manager over the whole store over here. Well I work in grocery and there's not even enough employees working over there to get everything done. Tired of being understaffed and having all these shitheads treat me lower than low. I don't control the shipments we get! Stop bitching at me for everything! Got my check clocked out and walked out. Didn't say anything. Hopefully they got the picture. Sorry this went off all over the place. But today was my last day ! Great to see that I'm not the only one. :)

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