Basically, I'm a puppy pimp. Yes, you may call me Cujo, the puppy pimp.
My time is spent retrieving baby dogs from cages and parading them around like it's the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show for trashy families in the hopes that they can be persuaded into paying too much money for them.
I work in a mall, so there is no shortage of trashy people.
Don't be fooled by the nature of the industry I work in: It is still retail. I may be selling beautiful living creatures, but make no mistake that to the hoards of disgustomers, animals are merchandise. And because I am the one selling the merchandise, I am degraded, mistreated, and dehumanized in the same way that I have been at every single retail job I've ever had over the past fifteen years.
I would like to say that the advantage of being around cute baby dogs all day makes it better, or at least in some way different... ....but it doesn't. It's still a retail job just like any other. The only thing that's different is the name of the business I say when I answer the phone.
It seems like the fact that I work in a PET STORE would come across pretty straightforward, but it doesn't. My store gets mistaken for a lot of other things, none of which fall under the category of 'legitimate business that should be respected as such'.
So here is a short list of places that I DO NOT WORK:
A Petting Zoo
I work in retail, meaning that it is my job to SELL MERCHANDISE, which in my case is cute fluffy little puppies. Despite popular belief, dogs don't sell themselves; in addition to hard work, persuasion, and forfeiture of a significant part of my soul, it also takes TIME to actually get someone to shell out two-weeks pay for a dog. That said, I can not stand the fact that these few resources that I have to do my job with are perpetually depleted by IDIOTS who think that my store is a Petting Zoo. I don't mind if people want to play with a puppy with no intention of purchasing one; it's not a crime. During the week when it's really slow I'm even thankful that people are willing to visit with the dogs, just so they can get out of their cages for a while. But when I am busy I don't need to be plagued by entitled grubby bottom-feeding leeches molesting my animals and further traumatizing them while taking my time away from my actual customers.
A Day Care Center
When I am not caring for the thirty-or-more puppies housed in my store at any given moment, I am attempting to care for the thirty-or-more obnoxious unattended children that get left in my store for hours at a time. One job is easier than the others; I'll let you guess which. I hate unsupervised children, especially where I work, since they're not allowed to touch the animals without a parent (a rule that I have no desire to break since the type of children that are left to be raised by mall-employees while their parents shop are inevitably savages). So they get dropped off, and they sit. And sit. And ask annoying questions. And continually ask for the forty-seven millionth time if they can hold a dog. And then they wander into the visitation rooms (where customers can spend time getting to know the dogs) and intrude on the families that are trying to shop and they latch onto the dogs that I have left in the care of other people.
If I had extra cages I would lock all of them up. Seriously, I would. I honestly believe I would get away with it... ...I don't think that the type of person that leaves their parenting to the strangers at the mall-store would take issue with their child being put in a cage.
A Puppy Mill
What's a Puppy Mill, you ask? A puppy Mill is an evil place where dogs are turned into little baby-factories that spit out piles and piles of puppies that are housed in an atmosphere that is so hazardous and disgusting that it makes Auschwitz look like Disney World!! They're terrible and they exist only to supply pet stores with malnourished in-bred abused dogs that will eventually attack children!! Every animal at a pet store comes from a Puppy Mill!!
But not really. This is just what ignorant and stupid people have been told by other people who are equally ignorant and stupid. From there they have never bothered to research the subject themselves (electing to believe what they want to) and slanderously repeat it to anyone who will listen.
Actually there's no such thing as a Puppy Mill, it's just a generic term for any breeder that vaules profit over the welfare of their animals. Unfortunately the term has become propaganda created for idiots to make them aware of something unknown and scary to them... ...and to feed their fear and cause unnecessary panic. A better word for 'puppy mill' is 'boogey man', or 'the Japanese.'
Yet on a daily basis I have to combat this ignorance and educate the general public on my industry. It sucks having to dignify stupid allegations from grown adults who still believe in the boogey man.
The seventh circle of hell where cute little fluffy puppies are euthanized for NO REASON
I was not aware of it, but I am apparently Satan's suck-bitch. Did you know this? I didn't know this! But if you ask any person who enters my store they will tell you about the horrible things that take place there.
In addtion to the ridiculous Puppy Mill PARANOIA, there also seems to be a lot of confusion about how a pet store is run in regards to what happens to the dogs that are not sold. I can only speak for where I work, but the owner of my store marks down the dogs until someone takes them, insuring that they all find a home. Apparently this logic is inconceivable to most, as I hear people whispering amongst themselves about what happens.
So exactly what happens?
It is somehow a common belief that all the unsold dogs get euthanized (my word: my customers wouldn't know what it means so they use the world 'kill' instead) due simply to the fact that they don't sell. And yes, I did say COMMON belief. An abundant amount of people have admitted to me that they are actually stupid enough to believe that a store in the mall kills healthy animals simply because they have gotten old.
Trust in the fact that if there was any killing taking place in my store by my hand, the animals would not be the ones on the receiving-end.
That will be it for today, the Seventh circle of Hell needs me back.
Until next time...