From McScrewyou Slave:
Hello all, same spiel you've heard before- longtime reader, first time submitter.
I come to you with a tale of woe and win. Let's start off with the win.
Now, I originally started typing this up as a reply to the question on tipping. But my comment was already quite long and I figured that this deserved a mention all its own.
This is back quite a few years (about 10 or so) over Christmas break. I believe that this was quite close to New Year's, but not New Year's itself (maybe two days before or something like that). I was raised by a single mom, so we didn't have a whole bunch of money kicking around and hardly ate out. Since it was the holidays, my brother was also visiting, so as a special treat mom ordered from Romeo's. We only did this maybe twice a year, and it was pretty special for 10-year-old. I always got the spaghetti & meatballs because the meatballs were almost as big as my fist. Pretty basic order; garlic bread, 3 pastas, and 3 cans of Barq's root beer.
So we place the order, and wait. Now, since mom is a single mother with little cash, we lived in this place on the outskirts of town (pretty old and a little dilapidated, but the biggest place I ever lived in growing up and the cheap rent made mom able to do things like buy her children Romeo's every now and then) and the restaurant the guy was driving from dead center downtown. So once they've made the food and driven it over it probably took around 40 minutes.
Well after we've done our waiting, the delivery driver gets to our door in pretty good time. Hands us the garlic bread, the pastas, and... oh, there was supposed to be pop with that? It was on the bill but didn't make it into his car for some reason. No big deal, mistakes happen, he removed the charge for them, mom paid and he went off on his merry way while mom told us to sit down and that drinking water tonight wasn't going to kill us. I was disappointed, but junk food wasn't a big part of our lives growing up so it wasn't a huge deal.
After we've been going at our food for a little, we hear a knock on the door. It's the delivery guy, with our 3 cans of pop. Now, keep in mind that he had ALREADY removed the charge on our bill for the pop, AND it would be at least a 30min round trip to come out here. We did not pay for this pop. It was not our pop. He was under no obligation to bring us the pop. He could have just said 'meh' and explained to his boss a mistake happened, the customer said it was no biggie, and gone on with his day.
Instead, he drove halfway across town just to drop off $3 worth of corn syrup and carbon dioxide so that a struggling single mom could give her children the tasty tasty beverages she had promised them for their New Year's feast. Truly a man who went above and beyond the call of duty.
And now for a tale of woe....
This takes place at the local McScrewyou's.
A guy (let's call him Major Moron) comes in with his son, and they take maybe a minute to decide. Nothing frustrating. He decides he wants to 'try that Double Quarter Pounder', orders the meal, and then his son orders the exact same thing. That's an important note- they both ordered the SAME THING.
I specifically remember that guy coming up, telling me he wanted to 'try' the DQP, and then me thinking 'heh, the kid wants to try it too'.
Cue the freakout.
Dude comes up to the counter and demands to see the manager. That's it. Not 'I think there might have been a mistake' but "I WANT TO SEE THE MANAGER.' Fortunately my manager was right there (even if it was the bitchy one... let's call her BM).
BM: I can help you.
MM: THIS ISN'T WHAT I ASKED FOR. I ORDERED A BIG MAC, MY *SON* ORDERED A DQP! AND THESE ARE TOO GREASY! I WANT YOU TO REMAKE THIS FOR ME WITHOUT ANY GREASE! (ummm.... you're in a fuckin' McScrewyou's and you're surprised at the presence of grease? Ooo-kaaay mister....)
BM: Well I'm sorry about that, I can get that fixed for you right away (types everything into the screen and admonishes me for not repeating the order, to which I reply I did, and I'm just standing there in 'WTF' mode trying to figure out, well... wtf.)
So, we put ALL fresh patties down on the grill so we can give Senor Dumbfuck his grease-free Big Mac, and wait for it all to cook. Assemble his new grease-free burgers (he also demanded his son's burger be remade as well, on account of the grease) and hand deliver them to his table. Before I've even reached him....
MM: THAT'S NOT A DOUBLE!
Me: .... what?
MM: I ORDERED A DOUBLE BIG MAC! THAT'S NOT A DOUBLE!
Me: .... but.... you..... just said Big Mac. I.... I can get it remade for you?
MM: OH NEVER MIND I'LL JUST TAKE IT I DON'T HAVE TIME TO WAIT FOR YOU PEOPLE!
Walk over to my manager completely stunned.
Me: So, now he's upset that he didn't get a Double Big Mac.
BM: ..... but..... he just said Big Mac.
Me: Well, he ALSO said he wanted a DQP.
BM: We can offer to put another piece of meat on it for him... (which we are technically SOOOOO not allowed to do, if they even touch it it's not allowed back across the counter. If someone's hot-cakes aren't hot enough, we can't nuke them, we throw them out and serve new ones. Even if all they did was open the lid, touch the cakes, and close the lid again. Nooooooo it'll kill everyone, burn it with fire!!)
Go back to to the moron....
Me: We can just take it back and put the other piece of meat on for you, it would take 30 seconds.
MM: *barely perceptible headshake* 
Me: (I just stand there for a few seconds, unsure if he didn't quite hear me or what)
MM's not-so-dumbfuck-friend: .... I think that's a no...
MM: I'M JUST LEAVING IT THE WAY IT IS BEFORE I DECIDE TO RIP YOUR MANAGER'S FACE OFF!!!
Walk back to my manager, relay the information.
BM: But... he said BIG MAC!
Me: *shrug*
So to recap, Douchey McDoucheface flew off the handle at two different employees for giving him EXACTLY WHAT HE ASKED FOR.
BOTH TIMES.
Well, my adventures in customer service continue. Wish me luck fellow wageslaves, this time next year I could be one semester through my biology studies and ankle-deep in the impending tidal wave of student debt! YAY FOR COMMERCIALISM!
--McScrewyou Slave
"Would you like a side of arsenic with that FUCKING DOUBLE QUARTER POUNDER that you ordered you asshole?"
Posted by: NC Tony | January 22, 2012 at 07:49 AM
NC Tony, your comments always make me happy.
McScrewYou Slave, I have had the same damned thing happen at Awful Waffle. I wish I could say I had a witty comment, but seriously..All you can manage to do in those situations is tilt your head and go "Huh?" Great example he was setting for his kid.
Posted by: KittyKatzchen | January 22, 2012 at 05:13 PM
They need to have sound recording on the tills! Could pwn so many douchebags that way.
Posted by: aasdsatr | January 22, 2012 at 05:21 PM