LadyLatte's coworker Singing Server, gets a Retail Balls Award for the clever comeback line he gave to a pushy enittled lady trying to be seated ahead of other people:
LadyLatte here with a tale of an entitled custy.
The cafe was so busy we had a waiting list going. I was taking names down in between serving and generally running around (servers are also food runners, bussers, hostess - we do it all here). I took down 3 groups of 4 and 4 groups of 2 in quick succession. That's a lot of waiting people when we have 9 inside tables, two bar areas (one can seat 4, the other 5), two porch 2-tops and 4 deck tables. But most people were being patient. I guessed a 20-min wait for this one woman who had a husband wandering somewhere and 2 kids who weren't being bad or good. They were staying out of the way and not screaming, so good enough.
15 min later she came up to my partner in crime, who I'll call SingingServer (he occasionally breaks out randomly into song. Really! And he's got an awesome voice) and complains that people are being sat before her that came in after her. I walk over to save him and explain to her that groups of 2 can be sat faster than her group of 4, but she is next on the list.
She points at the table I just sat and said they came in after her. I get a little pissy at this point because I took both those names down and did NOT seat the table out of order. "Ma'am, they came in before you. By about 10 seconds, but they were first."
At this point SingingServer rolls his eyes and says "Ma'am, the cafe is full. Unless you'd like to eat on the roof, you can either wait patiently or go elsewhere."
I was startled, because SS rarely gets agitated. "You are next on the list, ma'am. You'll be sat as quick as we can."
She huffed and walked off. I turned to Singing and asked if he was okay. He just shook his head and said he'd dealt with a lot of assholes that day.
She was sat in about 2 min, on the deck. The poor girl who got them was kept running around like mad. Their food came out too slow, the sun was too hot (how is it we control the weather??), blah blah blah. The husband came in after they ate and complained, loudly, to everyone in the waiting area. SingingServer nearly snapped, I didn't hear him I was waiting on other tables. After he realized no one was leaving he huffed off, according to Singing.
No tip, of course. People are asses. Thankfully most of our tables were nice but it's that 5% that drives us batty. Thank god the boss understands and doesn't get made about those 5%!