Instant (Dehydrated) Underpants: Hot Seller or Markdown?

"These underpants are conveniently compressed into a compact pellet. Just soak them with water momentarily and they’ll loosen up so that you can pull them apart! And remember, it's better to have damp underpants than no underpants at all! Each 2-1/2" round tin contains one pellet of disposable unisex underpants. Fits most children and small adults."

---------------------------------

I... I just... I mean...it... No. Just... no...

Anyone who buys these things has NEVER gone swimming in their underwear or worn a swimsuit. "Better wet than not at all." Go to hell. Go stright to hell and tell the Devil I'm coming for him.

Have you EVER worn a standard pair of underwear and gotten them wet at the beach or a river or a lake? Rides up so hard that you can TASTE that son of a bitch for daaayyys.

And that's not counting the unlocky sod born male. I don't know about you, but I suspect that anything that rides up the crack can ride up the sack, and I can just IMAGINE the full frontal wedgie given to any man unlucky enough to wear wet, cheap ass, instant panties. Does the phrase "split the twins" mean anything at all to you gentlemen? And... you know, maybe it's the horribly wrinkled appearance of the undies in the video, but those look like ruffles...

Gentlemen, tell me how eager you are to wear panties with RUFFLES?! And yes, I'm being deliberately facetious, because you can't give those things a masculine label of "tighty whities" or even "underwear." Thems be "panties" and there's no ifs, ands or "butts" about it. I wouldn't be caught dead wearing those, and I'm pretty sure no guy in his right mind would put on something that would feel like wet toilet paper with girlie gathers at the hems.

 May all your customers be nice,

Comments

[perky]

I think I'm scared for life....

[lor]

well i'm thinking you'd probably use them if you went to a hotel and lost you're luggage or something, because there's really no other reason i can think of for having a spare pair of undies in pellet form on you AND have access to water you can leave it in long enough to loosen up. Then you could just, i dunno, dry it with a hair dryer?

[Hellbound Alleee]

You guys ARE aware that these underpants are marketed as a gag gift, no?

http://www.mcphee.com/shop/products/Instant-Underpants.html

If you'd indulge me and look around this Seattle shop that sells them, you'll notice nothing there is serious, so...

[Wolfycat]

I love wearing wet panties!

[Bitch Boy]

Of course, if a guy really wants to wear panties, they have a product for that: http://www.manties.net/

What can I say? I'm really good at pulling pranks and finding gag gifts.

[NC Tony]

Not just no, but HEEEEEEELL NO!

[The Last Archimedean]

What NCT said.

[Nomnom]

I could probably fit some real, dry panties in the tin and be good to go.

[lamer]

Will it get my son to stop peeing his pants?

[Terry Everton]

Why are we suddenly treating satire as seriousness?

[Jo0b]

Archie McPhees is a fun place to go in the PNW.

[Spritzy]

Somebody send a crate of these to Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, and Brittany Spears.

[Book Baby]

I have been to Archie McPhee's and the place is truly THE weirdest place on Earth. You will find things you never knew existed.

That being said, I would rather head to the local Target or Wally World and spend a few bucks on an entire PACK of underwear rather than wear one pair of cheap-assed crap that wont fit MOST of us!

[Skittles]

I would absolutely wear those underpants/panties provided it was funny in some way to do so. Of course then again I have felated food in fancy restaurants because it was funny. Yeah I'm probably not the most normal person. One more thing when felating food in a restaraunt for laughs ranch dressing makes it even funnier.

[Chicajojobe]

Obviously satire. Although I will agree with OP that my opinion is the exact opposite to the statement "better damp underwear than none" as is anyone who's ever fallen overboard while boating, gotten caught in a heavy rain, or spilled a drink in their lap!