The Crusty With No Name... Or Basic Sense...

In memory of Hoarders, I got the glorious honor of hearing about this encounter with a Dumbass Crusty:

Info had a cart where harried employees could put down go-backs while waiting for a free moment. This cart was almost always piled with things that needed to be put away, usually haphazardly piled unless someone straightened it out of necessity to make room. A man approached the information desk and, without even looking at the employees, dumped his armload on the cart's already sizable pile and walked away.

A few minutes passed and the Info Slaves finally get a free moment. Knowing that the Info cart is one of the closing tasks required of them, they descend upon the cart like a pack of dogs on an unguarded steak and vanish into the sections of the store with their prizes. The cart is picked clean.

Fast forward to a full hour later.

Dumbass Crusty: Where are my books?!

Info Slave: What's your name? If it's on hold we can retrieve them.

Dumbass Crusty: I didn't leave it. My pile of books was right there! *points to the empty cart*

Info Slave: *blinks* You put them on the Go-Back Cart?

Dumbass Crusty: I left them there! You should have known not to put my books away.

Info Slave: Did you tell anyone that you were still shopping?

Dumbass Crusty: No!

Info Slave: Did you put your name on them? *gestures to a pile of scratch paper and pens in plain sight*

Dumbass Crusty: NO! I put them there! You should not have touched my books! I was going to buy them.

Info Slave: So you just left a pile of books in a random location, without telling anyone that you wanted them held, AND without putting your name on them?

Dumbass Crusty: Manager! NOW!

Manager, trying to diffuse the situation: Sir, do you know any of the titles you selected?

Dumbass Crusty: I don't remember.

Manager: Okay, do you know which subjects you got them from? *she gestures to the clearly labeled sections of the store*

Dumbass Crusty: No!

Manager: ...

Info Slave: ...

Manager: I'm sorry sir, but unfortunately there's nothing we can do to help you.

Dumbass Crusty: Service is horrible here! I'm never shopping here again!

Manager: Thank you very much, sir. Have a wonderful rest of the day.

Thank you kindly, sir, we never missed your non-existent patronage.

May all your customers be nice.

 

Comments

[The Last Archimedean]

If I've had to buy so many books I couldn't hold them all in my atms to get to the checkout stand, I buy half of them, put them in my car and return to the store to buy the other half. Simple...

[Shywriter]

I had a similar customer at B&N. I see a guy looking on both sides of our shelving cart. After asking him if I can help, it turned out he left a book there the day before or two, and expected it to still be there...Luckily we had a happy ending, he remembered the title of the book and I remembered it being on the cart and we found it. But seriously...

[NC Tony]

It goes back to the whole idea that we're supposed to be psychic. Crustys seem to get dumber and dumber every day. That guy is right up there with the people who ask you for a book. They don't know the name of the book, who wrote it or what genre it is, but they expect you to be able to find it because it has a blue cover.

[womens retail slave]

I had a similar story like this, while working at KMart. I was young and a cart pusher. I hated every minute of cart pushing, however we also got to randomly walk the aisles and clean randomly left items and restock custys returns or unwanted goods. There was this cart in the pharmacy dept just brimming with random crap. Noone in the area, and I walked by it maybe 5-6 times in 2hrs. We thought someone just left it. So we put it in our return area so we could sort it later. Not 15 minutes after we put it in the sorting area, some manager is looking for a cart with xxx, yyy, and zzz. I told her that I had found it in the makeup section just sitting there for 2 hrs. Apparently the customer went shopping, and then left her cart there so she could go get her kids from school. I still wonder if her kids died from leaving frozen foods, meats, and other assorted goods out in the open for 2 hrs.

[lynnsunfire]

Happens daily to me. I work at a large Canadian bookstore and people just leave their books wherever. I swear I have found books in piles under shelves and tables, in the bathroom and on the floor. Why would you put a pile of books on the floor and walk away? I have found books in the most random places.... And it never fails that an hour or two after I clean up the mess, some angry customer is demanding to know where their books are, and for the life of them, they can not remember what they picked out... Sigh

[Polo-Necked Strip Mall Monkey]

"Thank you for your non-existent patronage." Amen! The biggest assholes I have to deal with are not the regular customers, but the random idiots who wander in to waste time.

Oh yeah - we have a related species of this at Snotrub's Pet Store: we have a very small counter, one register. Even though there is a big sign saying, Please do not put your packages here until ready to check out, people will plop big bags of dog food and many cans and just walk away. Then someone else will come up and drop off another set of bags and food. I had a Home School Mom leave a large bag of food on the counter, then go off to sketch the pets for two hours while her car was being fixed. Then someone else will come and want to pay for their purchase.... If I move their bags off the register to a back counter, they act like they have been violated.

We Pet Store Slaves used to think, I bet these idiots don't try to get away with this stupid bullshit at the grocery store, etc etc etc - but I see from RHU they DO.