As most of you know, it was Thanksgiving this past weekend in Canada, and since Burger Bitch is Canadian and likes delicious Thanksgiving food, I tried to partake in some of the tradition. Well, I had to work most of the weekend, but I managed to go to my mom’s house for a nice Thanksgiving lunch before I had to go to work at 3PM. At 11:30AM, I get a text from my supervisor saying “Cunt McLardass wants to know if you want to come in early. Feel free to call and tell her to eat shit.” Now, does everyone remember Cunt McLardass? She’s my coworker who never shows up on time, spends her entire shift eating, smoking, or in the shitter, and whines constantly. Everyone’s memory jogged? Good.
I told my supervisor that I was visiting with my mom and my step dad and we hadn’t even eaten yet, so no, Cunt McLardass could work for once in her fucking life. Supervisor was completely ok with this considering she probably hates Cunt even more than I do. Now, if it were for anyone else, I would have tried to cut it short and come in early, but nobody else would have fucking ASKED on Thanksgiving. Plus, Cunt VOLUNTEERED to work a full shift on Thanksgiving, so she shouldn’t be fucking complaining!
I get to work around 2:45PM and the minute I walked through the door, Cunt looked at me and said “You REALLY couldn’t take an hour out of your life to come in early? My throat hurts.” Uhm, excuse the fuck out of me, bitch!? So I told her “No, because I have family that actually wants me around” and walked off to the back to get my uniform on. Not even a minute later, Cunt shouts that I have customers to serve. At this point, it’s not even 2:50PM, she still has ten minutes. I looked at Supervisor, who told me not to serve the customers until three.
Cunt then CASHED OFF and fucking walked away! So I had to serve customers before I even had the chance to put on my uniform. Even my manager is getting sick of her. When I went into work today, she told me to purposely not do anything, just to piss Cunt off. I loved it.
But now, onto the idiot customers, and believe me, I’ve had a lot.
I have no fucking idea why a parent would send their child into a store to get something for them, honestly. Because let me tell you, if you’re a parent, there’s a decent chance that your child is 100% more retarded than you believe.
Twice this week, I’ve had to serve a 6-10 year old kid who knows jack fucking shit about what to order or the value of money. So keep your kids in a cage or something and come in and order yourself.
(Yes, I hate kids. Thanks for noticing.)
But in all honesty, your kid doesn’t know what you want. So just get off your fat ass and come in yourself.
Then, just earlier tonight, I was almost hit by a car. How, you may ask? I was changing the garbage in the DT, right by the menu, and some dumb bitch just pulls right up and comes about two inches away from me. Are you fucking kidding me? If you see someone changing a garbage in the Drive Thru, just go INTO THE FUCKING STORE. Then the lazy cunt got mad at me because I was taking too long to take her order, to which I informed her that if she went in, someone would be glad to help her while I did my job and changed the garbages.
Now, the final thing that’s really starting to get on my nerves; Customers asking me if I have “Fresh coffee made.” I work in a fucking coffee shop, so no, but I have fresh motor oil and abortions ready for you. What the FUCK do you think!? I’m actually starting to answer them with “We ALWAYS have fresh coffee, it’s a coffee shop.” And seriously, we do. We get in crazy shit if we leave the coffee sitting there for over half an hour, so we ALWAYS have fresh coffee. Fucking dipshits.
Thanks for letting me rant guys. In case you’re wondering why I’m more angry than funny in this post is strictly due to stress from school, work AND having idiot roommates. But thanks for letting me have a place to bitch.
A good thing though, a regular told me that I reminded them of Randal Graves from Clerks. Because he saw me tell off a rude customer. Best compliment ever? I think so!
I swear to make more dick jokes next time.