Funny Service Moment At Vons Grocery Store

Hey, guys. Fluffernutter here. Some of you may recognize my comments on posts criticizing hellspawn or praising Karebear & Terry Everton (hey-o!), but this one is my first actual post.

I was a customer at the local Vons grocery store, where every single employee I have encountered is rad at their job (and every slightly embarrassing WIC transaction I have to do NEVER takes more than 2 minutes, praaaaaaaaaaaise beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee to zoooombiiiiiieeeee jaaaaaaayssuuuuuussssss), & this funny little moment happened that I felt I should share with you lovelies.

Checker: Hi! I'm opening up another cash if you'd like to come over here...

Me: SWEET. *magically maneuvers stroller full of 198640581 cans of pureed pears & carrots that-a-way while in work heels*

Checker: Find everything you were looking for today?

Me: Yes, thanks! So, you can run *this* through first since *those* have to be a separate transaction.

Checker: Mmkay then. And how has your day been going?

Me: Fine, and yours? 

*first transaction rings up*

Bagger: Find everything you were looking for today?

Me: Yes, thank you.

Bagger: And how has your day been going?

Me: Fine, and yours?

*second transaction rings up, bagger realizes there is a person there and slave training kicks in*

Bagger: Find everything you were looking for today?

Me: Yes, thanks.

Bagger: How has your day been going?

Me: Fine, and yours?

*collective mental twitch as checker, bagger, and myself realize what just happened*

*communal reflexive moment*

Me, Checker, Bagger: Have a nice day!

...and that, guys and dolls, is DEFINITELY when you know you've been serving the chaotic retail gods FAR TOO LONG.

Sigh.

--Fluffernutter

 

 

Comments

[Mrs. Lovett]

Fluffernutter, I like your writing style. And I totally know how those slaves feel. When I used to work at B&N, I can't tell you how many times a customer would hand me a member card, I'd start the transaction, and then I'd ask "Do you have a B&N member card?" before realizing what had just happened. It gets hard-wired into your brain and it's totally reflexive!

[The Last Archimedean]

You know you've been working retail too long when...

Oh well. At least everyone managed to laugh about it.

[perky]

Yep, at work I feel like an automatic robot. "how are you today?"

"Find everything you need?"

*laughs at dumb joke crusty made*

"Would you like to save 2% every time you shop with us by signing up for our gold rewards membership?"

"Do you have any coupons?"

"credit or debit?"

"Thanks for shopping with us today, have a lovely afternoon..."

x100+ times a day.

[Karebear]

I always felt like I had to unscrew my jaw from smiling at the crusties. And, even though I no longer work there, I ask the cashiers if they want to apply for a Wal-mart credit card....for some reason I see cash register, I see the packets about the cards, and it just flies out of my mouth. Gives them a giggle sometimes though when I do a facepalm.

[Fortune Cookie]

I am always asking custies basic questions when we've been over them already as well. And then I am like "Sorry, [insert lame joke to make custy laugh]." Only one more month of this nonsense and I am gone :)

[Fluffernutter]

Thanks, Mrs. Lovett! Glad to hear you approve. I'd hate to end up in one of yer pies. ;P I've been making taxable income since I was 14, so some habits are sadly wired in my brainpan for good by now! At least the good customers totally know what's up and laugh along with you when it happens.

Thanks, Everton! I'll try... working reception desk at a place where many creepy old men think they can get a happy ending with their spa treatment is a special kind of hell... ohhhhh sweet odin tits the wonders of employment. Sigh.

Perky, don't forget the "sir, would you like your receipt?" *dude grumbles and walks away* *you throw receipt away and move onto next customer* "HEY! you forgot to hand me MAH rah-ceipt!" /headdesk

[CharlieWhiskyMike]

I remember back in my callcenter days when we end every call with the Phrase "Thank you for your call":

I had placing an order during my break to a Mail Order Company via telephone and guess what i Said at the end: Thank for your call.

When i was working early at 7:00 am after working till 9:00 pm the Day before and thinking about some matters from the previous evening i sometimes Said Good evening instead of Good Morning

[Fluffernutter]

Oh, Karebear I know exactly how you feel! It's so bad! Every time I'm shopping in the grocery store I USED to stock/merchandise graveyard shift at, and a custy asks where an item is- I feel obliged to tell them even though my old job didn't actually include any customer interaction. SO WEIRD! :3

Fortune Cookie, congrats on your escape.

CWM, it happens more often than you know... I've called up my favorite late night italian delivery place to order some pasta & a bottle of burgundy after a long day at the office... and when they pick up the phone accidentally responded with "thank you for calling blah blah blah, this is fluffernutter, how may I assist you today?". D: I'm sure they got a good chuckle out of it though!

[CashierBtch]

I always ask for peoples rewards cards... while I'm holding it... I do it alot, but I just tell myself that I least I remember to ask..

And Fluffernutter, the WIC thing 99% of the time has nothing to do with you or the program (at least at my store) its just a tedious transaction that they change the process of every year, which isn't good when on a register that sees maybe one or two WIC transactions a month. Plus the fruits and veggie ones have to be done a separate way from regular vouchers. Its not your fault, you're just trying to feed your kids. I blame the store's company for changing the transaction process to often that its hard to keep track of how we are supposed to do it properly.

[TechTiger]

When I worked for IBM, I got into the habit of the way we answered the phone so much ("Hi, this is Techtiger, can I have your ticket number please.") that before I finally turned off the phone during the day, if someone called while I was in bed I'd roll over and answer my home phone that way.

I'm not particularly social, and have developed reflex answers to certain types of 'how are you today' questions. Funny when I run into someone ELSE who has done the same thing, and we go around the ring a couple of times before we notice. "Hey, how's it going." "Not bad, how about you?" "Pretty good, how about you?" "Not bad, how about you?"

[Fluffernutter]

Oh, Cashierbitch, I know they're complicated to deal with. I always tear off the little bits on the edges of the checks and organize my groceries OCD style for the checker, cash transactions first (so they can wrap it up quick for the next customer since I don't need a receipt for WIC), but sometimes stuff clearly marked as "ok" in my little brochure doesn't match up with their shelves, etc. I always go to the same store that deals with a lot of those transactions, though, so I know they're familiar with the current system. It's just a general pain to deal with, and I'm not on food stamps since I don't need em', only WIC- I can feed myself, hell, I can buy babby cereal and canned food just fine even if things are a bit tight that month- but formula adds up SO FAST when my son goes through a cannister every 2-3 days, it's nice to have some help in that regard. :]

One of my neighbors actually works at this location, so sometimes the baggers and I actually poke a little sarcasm at each other comrade-style.

[Humor_Me]

The hardest part for me was changing jobs.

"Welcome to/Thanks for calling [insert last place of employment]. My name is Humor Me, how can I help you?"

The number of blank stares and pregnant pauses I got on the phone were mind-numbing. It was worse when I was working between 2 pet sores waiting for my 2 weeks notice to be up.

[CashierBtch]

I'm glad that WIC has vouchers (we even say "WIC, some people have gotten offended) for baby formula. Some that I've seen were $30 a pop. And those containers are tiny! This day and age, anything that helps, right?

[adjustable bed]

OAP turns to smile at me again, and his smile has noticeably lost its cheery edge and is now looking more like a lecherous smirk.