In honor of a first timer's awesome response to a stressful situation for a customer, and to the retail balls she displayed to her douchebag coworkers, I proudly present the retail Balls Award!
I thought I would put forward a tale from about 12 years ago, making me 18. This story is just about the cruelest thing I believe I have ever witnessed. The villains of this story were my brand new coworkers at a rather small but popular salad bar joint.
It was my first day and I was informed that the girl who was supposed to train me had gone into labor so not only was I not going to be trained, but they were going to 'throw me to the wolves' and see how I did. I did rather well, I like to think: the job was easy enough as almost everybody ordered salad bar. There were menu options but they were limited and also came with the salad bar and it helped that we were famous for our sweet tea. So the night was flying by and I was having fun.
Then I notice some of the waitresses standing in front of the door staggering around with their hands out and eyes closed as if groping for something, and laughing uproariously. Curious of course I trot over to see what the joke was. And to my everlasting horror and shame they were making fun of a woman standing outside the door who was quite obviously blind.
I ran out and said, "Ma'am, can I lead you inside?"
No response. But I notice that she's signing. As in American Sign Language. Holy shit on a biscuit this woman was blind and deaf and just standing on the sidewalk of our restaurant!
I didn't know the etiquette but I knew she was freaking out so I gently took her hand and put it on my arm and she calmed down. I led her in and seated her in the booth. At this point I will thank god for regulars because a bunch of them knew what was going on.
Turns out the waitress who was giving birth (now called BirthinServer or BS) was also a caretaker for this woman after she got off of work and she always met her outside and "Shirley" would get a steak sandwich and a sweet tea while she waited for SB! I shot off a quick phone call to my sister who (Thank God!) majored in ASL. My sister rushed over to my new job and sat with "Shirley" both were equally tickled pink as my sister rarely got to practice her ASL on someone who was also blind. Thank god (again) we were able to contact the right people to help this poor woman out.
My manager was also really great with her and through my sister told Shirley that BS had gone into very premature labor and in the emergency no one thought to call her!
Nothing ever happened to those waitresses, though I did read each and every one of them the riot act and told them all that I've never been so ashamed to be a human being and ended the spiel with my now famous closing statement, "Y'all can go to hell, Y'all just go to hell and die... in that order!"
Needless to say I did not last long at that job and on applications when giving a reason for leaving I had to put "Irreconcilable Differences With My Coworkers"!
Ever want to just kill your coworkers with fire?