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'Another custy had also come in while I was actually able to give assistance and wasn't covered clearance tags. I greet as I am trained, "Hi! Welcome to Glitter Heaven!"

"I'm just looking, thanks." Custy seems a bit short in tone, but I continue offering assistance, again, as trained.

"Who are we shopping for today?" (Custy is clearly not part of our target shopper range, so it must be for a gift) I reply. I should note that most customer absolutely love the way I become a semi-personal shopper for them.

"I'm just looking, thanks." Custy snaps back. I take the hint, but also know what my company wants to sell at the moment.

"Ok, well make sure you check out our new collection of glitter, it's in the front corner!"

Custy suddenly makes eye contact with me, "You know, you're being really aggressive!"'

Frankly, if you were doing things according to 'protocol and training', there's a serious problem with protocol and training where you work. If a customer makes a clear indication that they want to be left alone, you leave them the fuck alone. That's called 'treating the customer like a human being'. If I was the customer there, my reaction would be somewhat similar. This isn't your fault, but it is something that should be highlighted to those who's fault it actually is, if possible.


I'm going to agree with Zmidponk here. Not your fault since you we're simply doing as you were told to and avoiding write ups and the like, but I hate it when I want to just browse around and employees continue to ask me what I need or who I'm shopping for after I tell them I'd rather shop alone. It's definitely a problem that the people in charge of creating the training need to address but it probably will always remain this way since it pressures people into purchases they'd otherwise not made. :/
And again, not your fault. I had to do the same thing in fast food by trying to upsell or suggest promo items every time someone came in. Most people didn't care or got annoyed, but I had to do it to stay out of trouble.


I have to agree with Zmidponk here... there are definitely times when I'm glad to go to a store and get quick help finding something specific, but especially in a craft store I usually just want to walk around and check out what is new for the season. A customer should only have to say once that they don't need any help.

Also maybe it's just me, but I HATE it when people use "we" when asking you a question. That's how you talk to children--it's really demeaning to an adult. A much better way to phrase that would be "what can I help you with today?" Finally, I find it offensive that you assumed this customer was shopping for a gift. I've gotten that kind of profiling done to me so many times and it is really irritating and embarrassing when retail staff assume that you're not the kind of person who belongs in their store based on the way you look. I understand pushing special sales etc. but it would definitely help to remember to treat customers the way you want to be treated.

The Last Archimedean

I have to agree with the crowd here. Not YOUR fault, you're just doing what you were told [but dammit, when did employers turn into Nazi Germany? "I can't think for myself, I have to do what I was told or I'll get written up and possibly fired." I much prefer when a store lets their employees use common sense.] Certainly though the set procedures need to be modified. Don't know who in Upper Management is in charge of that but you need to have a string of customers complain to Upper Management that the employees are forced to follow a procedure that's upsetting the customers and they should be allowed to leave the customer alone when it's clear the customer doesn't want or need help.


Have to say I'm going with the majority here. Yes, she could've been nicer, but sometimes I just don't want to talk to salespeople. Either cause I'm in one of my low moods where I feel worthless and don't want my existance even acknowledged or because I'm in a hurry or just not feeling good physically. Training or not, you should've left her alone.

Also the profiling is a bit awful too. That's like the time a Victoria's Secret worker (who was almost as fat as me) assumed I couldn't fit into any of their bras. Even though I had been wearing VS bras for years and the skinny workers never had any problem finding me bras that fit.

Or even worse, the time this 40 something blonde lady in a shop near the Balboa Fun Zone decided my mom and I were shoplifters.


Yep, going to agree too.. Maybe you should let managers know that this training doesn't always work. As an Introvert, I prefer being quiet and left alone. I am very happy that way!! I f I need help I ask :)

Miss Red

I'm a shopping introvert myself. I don't mind the initial "Hi, is there anything I can help you with today?" If I know what I want, or I'm just looking, a smile and a "no, thank you." should send an associate on their way. If they persist, that just makes me want to get the hell out of there.
I think we should have special shirts made up that say, "INTROVERT SHOPPER. I prefer to be left alone, and I will come find someone if I have any questions, thank you."


Agreeing with the masses, it drives me nuts when I can't just look around, although I tend to be more polite in my responses than that lady was. What I have to wonder is what does her appearance have to do with whether or not she is part of your target demographic? The first lady you hadled wuite well though. There is no reason to offer extra help to people who are rude and entitled.


I'm going to go against the masses here. This is how I see it, GlitterSlinger engaged the customer and asked an open-ended question in order to be helpful. When the customer refused help GlitterSlinger ended the conversation with a suggestion and backed off. I do not see that as aggressive at all. It was all of two sentences. Is it really all that difficult to remain polite for all of two sentences? I could see the crusty having a point if GlitterSlinger had continued to ask question, followed the customer, or checked in on her several times. But it does not seem that any of that had happened.


Actually, Perky, it wasn't just a two sentence exchange. It didn't go open with a question, get rejected, end convo with suggestion. It went open with question, get rejected, ask ANOTHER question making assumptions, get rejected again, then end with a suggestion. It's that second question and the accompanying phrasing and profiling that the masses are taking exception too. If it happened to me I would definitely find it annoying in a way that question-rejection-suggestion would not be.

Also I saw no indication of the sex of the second custy - I kind of assumed it was a man. In which case the profiling of "not a target demographic" would be a bit more obvious in a store called "GlitterHeaven" in a way that "fat girl at Victoria's Secret" is not.


I have to agree if someone asked me "Who are we shopping for today" I'd find that really patronising - I think it's pretty condescending even if you are speaking to child. To an adult, and a stranger, it's definitely rude.

I also agree that if you are being trained and encouraged to keep pushing customers who have made it clear they'd prefer to shop alone, and you have to do that to keep your job, then I don't blame you for that, but given that the customer had already **twice** made it clear that they didn't want help, then you *were* being aggressive. And "I'm sorry you feel that way" isn't an apology. "I'm sorry, GlitterHeaven Policy requires me ask you / offer you the special deals" That way, you are acknowledging their (legitimate) feeling that they are being pressured.
I think you were fine with the first customer, but in the second scenario, it's the customer I feel sorry for.

Headset Hellion

"I'm sorry you feel that way," is a passive-aggressive way of offering an insincere apology without actually accepting any responsibility for wrong-doing.

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