You can call me Restie Slave.
Well here it goes... This one is a custy, drunk to the point of crawling, and I was in the middle of dashing around serving customers food, working the bar, and taking money from the paying customers, with a new girl on her second ever shift who doesn't know what the hell she's doing. Yeah, short staffed and the other member they put with me is new, so add training new girl to my growing list.
Drunky custy: I want a pint of carlingssssss (seriously, she said it like that)
Me: Ok, that'll be (so many GBP)
Drunky: You've ruined it!
Me: I'm...Sorry...What have I ruined?
Drunky: My pint! I want it in a carlingsss glassss
Me: Ok (I tipped it into a labeled glass for her)
Drunky: You've ruined it!! I wanted a half pint!
Me: I'm sorry, I must have misheard I thought you wanted a pint.
Drunky: (mutters something unintelligible) Yeah that.....(mutters under her breath) ruined it, ruined my pint.
I finally gave up, tipped it into a half pint glass and gave it to her. Oh joy.
That was not the end of stupid and/or drunk custies that night.
The next lovely lady to grate on my nerves complained that it was taking too long for their table to be served their starters (please bear in mind, we have to hand-write the orders and bills; no fancy tills for us, and take the order to the kitchens were they have to read what we've written and start getting it ready). This table was HUGE, 17 of them and she dares to complain?!
Me: I'm very sorry for the wait, please bear in mind you have ordered off of the more expensive menu and those starters take a little bit longer to make up.
Custy: Hmpf. FINE. (Waits until she thinks I'm out of earshot and starts muttering to the person sat next to her in German...I'll translate to english instead of typing German... "She's an idiot, she's obviously lying."
To which I turn around and respond back in German, "Ich verstehe!" (I understand!)
Stupid custy immediately clams up, and she has been back and has learnt that I'm the only member of staff who is bilingual, but if she is mean about another member of staff in German again, she'll have me to deal with.
So yeah... plenty of stupids in England!