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Comments

CatWrangler

You know it might be a good wake-up call to let them not be allowed to sell cookies. Once you step back someone will have to step forward. By always picking up the slack you are enabling them. It doesn't excuse the behavior though. If it wasn't so unfair to the kids themselves I'd say go with the no help no cookie sells. Hang in there you rock.

Zalira

Don't let them sell cookies!! Let them qq and whine and bitch. Then tell them 'Oh, sorry, no one wanted to do it and I am not allowed to do that on top of everything else I do so tough cookies to you.'
Don't let the crazy person do it, I had to help with cookies one year and my mother 'lost' half the paperwork....it was a NIGHTMARE afterwards.

Zalira

Also, :sends hugs and cupcakes: If you lived within walking distance of me I'd totally help you out! I loved helping my sister's Brownie troops when they were little :3

CoG

First: kudos to you, Perky. Girl Scouting is important to a lot of little girls and your help is allowing them to have good experiences with it.
Second: hire the dude. If you're in charge of finding the other person to help you, and you know the one leader is nuts and never turns in her paperwork on time, then I say that's all the reason you need not to bring her on. "I'm sorry, but this is important, and she's proven herself unreliable in the past. I'd like to give this gentleman the opportunity to do a good job and set an example for our girls as a responsible male role model."

Lee

If it weren't so unfair to the girls, I'd say just let them cry and not be able to sell cookies. But I was in GS for years and the cookie selling was the only part I enjoyed... I know that'd give you a LOT of devastated little girls. I'd say go with the husband, at least HE'S willing to help out (and not crazy).

Bored at the Bookstore

Oh, my dear Perky/Someone Else, I have stood in your place. I wasn't a big wheel, but I had a twenty-girl Brownie Troop, which became a scout troop and eventually a Cadette troop, and never got any smaller. Not one parent ever, ever helped when asked - except the annual camp out, which I got out of because I'm allergic to the trees at the camp (whew!). When the girls were Brownies and scouts and met in the afternoons, all the moms were "working" - I was evidently the only SAHM in town - when we moved to Cadettes, I asked for help again, because the meetings moved to evenings. So did all the moms' jobs, amazingly enough.

I was also always the Cookie Mom, and I was Crafts Coordinator for all the troops in town of all ages. Had to come up with (new) age-appropriate crafts year after year after year. And acted as Den Mother to Tiger Cubs and Cub Scouts in the meanwhile.

When parents complained that we never went on field trips or to museums, etc, I asked for drivers/chaperones - because you can't stuff twenty girls into one station wagon. No one was ever available. Well, you can, but it's strongly frowned upon. The one time I did get a volunteer to assist in shepherding duty and we spent a day in Boston, we lost one person; the adult chaperone. In the days before cell phones, that was a little scary, especially for the woman's daughter! But she finally showed up at the train station, just in the nick of time.

When my daughter earned her Silver Award, she decided she was done with Scouts, and we both quit. Should've seen 'em scramble then! And, surprise, surprise, they found another leader. Leaders, actually, because no one else would taken on the entire troop. And they figured out their own darned craft projects.

My sister was like me, except she did Cubs, Webelos, _and_ PTA. She was also a Navy wife raising six stairstep kids while her hubby was at sea for three months at the time. She also burned out and quit cold turkey. The groups all survived.

One word of advice, from one veteran of the Scout Wars to another: once you announce "No Cookie Volunteers, No Cookie Sales", stick to it. Don't back down! So the troops won't have that income? Too bad, Moms and Dads! Kudos, btw, to the dad who offered to help. BIG pat on the back, there.

Bless you. Without Someone Else, where would we all be?

LadyPhoenix

Either have the husband volunteer if it is that important.

Otherwise, announce that there will be NO cookie sales because no one would volunteer and you were not allowed to take the roll because you had other GS duties.

Parents need to take SOME responsibility, or don't even bother signing up at all.

perky

Thank you guys. If it wasn't for the fact that it would hurt the girls in the end, then I would just say "To Hell With It All" But when ever I get to that point I see their cute little faces having so much fun...and I just can't do it.

I think I will appoint the husband as the primary Cookie Chair. It makes me a little uncomfortable since I have to work pretty closely with the cookie chair during the cookie season, and I don't know if his wife is a jealous woman or not. KWIM? But I will also invite the crazy leader to help out and give her some small tasks that if they do not get done it is no problem. I think her main function will be to have a 3rd person at the cookie meetings so that his wife does not think that the cookie meetings are "dates."

Chicajojobe

@perky,

Honestly, I wouldn't worry about that at all. It isn't your problem if his wife is jealous.
You aren't doing anything wrong. You didn't personally seek him out to ask him to be Cookie Chair, he volunteered. Presumably he discussed it with his wife first (it may have even been her idea), but even if he didn't, again, their problem not yours!

This is no different than if you had to work late with a male co-worker at your paying job. This isn't some guy you're hanging out with for the hell of it, he's the father of a girl scout in your jurisdiction and you're his boss in a way.
The Girl Scouts is and should remain mostly female run, but it's also a good idea for fathers to be involved in their daughters activities.

Trucker Bitch

In my Girl Guide district, if no one volunteered for a position someone would be "volun-told" to it. Happened to me during the planning of a district camp. I had to miss one of the planning meetings (I can't remember why) only to find out I had been volunteered to organize one of the activities. Granted, all involved were leaders already.

I actually had no experience doing the activity, but I sucked it up, studied what was needed, and did it. And planning an activity that's easy enough for girls as young as 5 and interesting enough for 17/18 year olds is not a simple task.

perky

@Chicajojobe I hear what you are saying, and I agree with you. But I have seen similar incidents tear a girl scout troop apart. Thankfully it wasn't in my service unit, but it was MESSY! A lot of hard feelings all around. So I will take steps to avoid something like that.

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