I am a moderator for an MMORPG (can't say which one, even though I don't get paid, I'd like to keep my job), and frequently this finds me working customer service for the parent company. I am up at 3AM, when I could be asleep in my nice warm bed, cuddled up next to my teddy bears. Instead, I'm helping some dipshit from fucking Estonia who bought an upgrade and doesn't understand why her account was banned. She came up to me in-game and asked me for my forum username, so that she could tell me of her plight. Being the nice person I am, I accepted my role as customer service representative. That was my first mistake.
It took over an hour to wheedle out of her that she's from Estonia. This required me to either continue reading her unintelligible English or learn Estonian real quick. Thank God for Google Translate. We managed to communicate, in her broken English and my broken Estonian, and I found out that she'd asked this girl in the US to buy her upgrade, which I don't believe.
Why not, you may ask? Because the upgrade was purchased with a stolen credit card. Even when I explained to her in Estonian that this was theft and fraud, all she could say was, "But I used credit. How come I don't have upgrade?" and then "But who pay for upgrade?" when I told her that she could pay the money herself (or have her "friend" send a money order) to get her account unbanned.
Ok, custys, if you default on your payment, you don't get to keep your shit. If you use a stolen credit card, you don't get to keep your shit. You go to fucking jail!
Maybe they treat fraud differently in Estonia.
Also, since I'm not getting paid for this, I don't get paid enough to put up with custy shit. I've been called a fucking whore -that one was interesting- he said "blow me you fucking whore" in Polish. He was not expecting me to answer "Umm... rozumiem Polski" ("Umm... I understand Polish")- a bitch cunt, fatass noob, fucking pathetic staff who has no life so you work for a game (umm... and you're playing it. Wtf?) for not giving people free items or upgrades.
No free lunch, bitch! Oh, I've also gotten threatened with a lawsuit. Yes, a custy threatened to sue me. She made a flamewar topic in the game forum where she bitched about paying customers and basically told everyone to fuck off. I locked the topic. She responded by threatening to sue me for "fraud and seduction". I responded with the following email:
"Please explain to me how you're going to sue me for fraud or seduction. The only way I "wronged" you was to lock a topic that you started simply to insult everyone, while encouraging you to complain of the same thing in the proper area and after making a reasonable post. As far as I can tell, neither I nor my parent company have intentionally deceived you for profit or some other nefarious reason. I also fail to see how I have used promises, deception, or bribes to engage you in unlawful sexual activity. I'm not a lawyer, but I'd appreciate it if you learned some legal definitions before threatening legal action against me.
Have a wonderful day!"
This is a huge step for me- I'm the one who cried when the bridesmaidzilla screamed at me for the cake shop's ineptitude. Now I get to tell people to fuck off as hard as they can- nicely, of course. We have a very strict morals clause (ie.I think it's technically not allowed that I have said that I have a boyfriend.)
It's not retail, but it is customer service. And I can't even drink to relieve the pain.