I just recently found this site and immediately added it to my favourites bar! I'm from the great land up north, better known as America's Hat. You may call me Ms Kew. (left over nickname from working in a pool hall)
I've worked in the Call Center environment for about 3 1/2 years, 2 different companies, 3 clients.
The first client was an online retail store for a major electronics company. Actually a really good job and company, decent bonus structure and not bad custies. The only bad (?) custies were the ones who thought they should get a better discount for being "long time, loyal Phony customer." Yeah, that would be why we have NO record of sales or warranty information on you.
The second client was the 3rd largest cable company in the States. Some of the custies I dealt with were unreal! The following is as near a verbatim of the call as I can remember. I would not have believed that there are people out there this stupid if I hadn't heard the words.....
Me: Thank you for calling Barter. My name is Ms Kew. How may I help you with your cable services this evening?
Cx: (heavy Southern accent) Why's my TV not working?
Me: I'm sorry to hear that, sir. If I could get your name and phone number, I will definitely look into this for you.
Cx:' *provides info*
Me: Thank you. I regret to inform you that there is an outage declared in your area due to a power outage.
Cx : But I's gots my gen'rator plugged in! Why's my TV not working?
Me: Sir, has there been any severe weather in your area recently that may have caused a power outage?
Cx: Well, hell, there's a damn hurr'cane blowin' through! Gots trees and crap all over the place!
Me: Well, if a tree has taken out the power lines, they most likely took down the cable lines as well
Cx: But the lines from the pole to my trailer are still up! Why's my Tv not working?
The most recent custy from hell I dealt with was from Quebec. For those not in the know, there is a strong separatist movement in Quebec and a lot of Quebecers who think EVERYONE should speak French.
Now Hell is actually a reasonably smart company. If the call originates in QC, the message the custy hears is "For service in French, press 1 or stay on the line. (in French). For service in English, press 2 (in English). So, in order to be put through to an English speaking agent, you must DELIBERATELY choose '2'!
So, I get this woman with a heavy french accent who, after I complete my opening spiel, very politely, asks me to go over some charges on her bill. So far, so good .
I pull up her account, and her entire bill is in French! Also, every note on her account is in French! When I mention that as everything is in French, it's going to take a minute as I need to pull up Google translate so I can understand exactly what has been going on with her account. This is when she went from being a polite, reasonable customer to a complete ranting and raging Crusty! She can't BELIEVE that Hell would hire someone who couldn't understand her account! And then she switched and started yelling at me in French! When she finally stopped to take a breath I asked her if she would prefer to be transferred to a French speaking agent. Oh no, she wanted me to speak to her French.
"Everybody I deal with needs to be able to speak French" Starts another unintelligible rant.
"Je ne parle pas francais, Madam."
Cue another 5 minute rant that I could not understand.
"One moment while I transfer you to our French queue"
"Don't you dare......"
I have many more stories of CSR hell to relay, so until next time, keep your stick on the ice!