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Preston Johnson

Since companies are greedy, heartless bastards, we need a federal law banning all companies from punishing sick workers who take time off. Every violation should be a $1,000 fine directly from the compensation of all the top executives.


Add a few extra zeroes to that, Preston, and they'd make sure if you even had a sniffle, you have a perfectly good paid sick day to use, because they wouldn't want that falling on their head.

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