Retail Hell Underground

Last Shift of Retail Hell Soured By A Rude Bitch

Hello RHUers StarBitchSoldier here with awesome news.

I no longer work for Hurls Sr!!! :D

My husband just got a job he loves with a great salary so I no longer have to worry about hours while in school. Yay!!! So I told my boss today that we will be relocating in the beginning of Next month an hour away so I couldn't stay if I wanted to... Not that I do. He was pretty cool with it and asked if I was comfortable just finishing this week instead of a two week notice because I need the time to get our move ready. Plus it's super slow so I wouldn't get many hours regardless.

So now I have the time to pack up and get everything ready to move without stressing as much about school.

Once we are situated, I'll probably still get a part time job but at least this time it's for fun and a little extra cash without any worrying about cut hours.

Of course my last shift had to be soured by a rude bitch though. I was the only person on register so I had both drive thru and diner customers to worry about. Not unusual, I do it all the time. I'll take care of whoever came through first and let anyone who comes by after to hold until I finish taking their order.

So I get two guys in the diner who order. In the middle of their order a woman pulls up to drive thru YELLING her order.

I politely ask her hold and continue the guys' order.

This bitch then starts yelling even louder "UH HELLO? NO ONES IN FRONT OF ME YOU ARE WASTING MY DAMN GAS WHY THE HELL ARENT YOU TAKING MY ORDER?!?"

It was so loud the two guys could hear her clearly from my headset. I asked her to hold once more. Again, same tirade so I snap a little. I don't care, it's my last day.

So I tell her as politely as I can manage, "I'm sorry but seeing that I am the ONLY one working the registers for both drive thru and diner, I am serving someone who came in the diner before you pulled up. I will be with you shortly. " and then pulled the headset off my head.

The two guys stared at me in disbelief before saying "what a BITCH she is!" and "make sure you make her order with extra spit-- I mean love!"

At least I had some awesome custys to counteract her. I finally took her order after making her wait a little longer than needed (she deserved it.) We go through the process (making sure to take my sweet ass time) and when I hand her the bag this bitch has the nerve to tell me to hold on so she can finish a fucking phone app.

Are you fucking kidding me?

At least I got the last laugh. Her fries got "fluffed", made to look full but the bottom is practically empty and she waited for almost ten minutes in the drive thru.  

And one of the guys from earlier called her a bitch loud enough for her to hear.  :D

So anyways, the crusty kinda soured my last shift but at least I'm done there. We will see how the job search goes in the new area.

--StarBitchSoldier

 

Random Act of Retail Kindness at The Golden Arches: A Custy Valentine

Hello, Mollywobbles here (that's what I go by in the comments). 

I just stumbled upon this site a few weeks ago and I've had plenty of stories I could think of to write in, but they're all a bit too specific (i.e., if my managers happened to also stumble upon the site, they'd know it was me in a heartbeat).  Anyway, I wanted to write in about a particularly stand-out event that happened today, Valentine's Day, at McScrewYou's.

The particular location I work at is across the street from a local hospital, and we often have nurses, etc. come by during their lunch break.  It being Valentine's Day and all, one nurse came in carrying a small, clear box full of (about 4 or 6) chocolate-covered strawberries. 

As I'm ringing her order up, I joke, "You're gonna share those, right?" and she and I both laugh. 

I ask her where she got them (making it clear that I was, in fact, joking and perhaps intended to later stop by and buy some for myself), to which she replies "The hospital gift shop.  They're selling them for Valentine's Day." 

I tell her they look good and that I haven't had chocolate-covered strawberries in years.  I finish ringing her up, her food comes up and she goes about her lunch hour. 

I honestly didn't think anything of it - until she comes back about 10-15 minutes later and hands me her little clear box with two chocolate-covered strawberries in it. 

She says, "Happy Valentine's Day!", smiles, and leaves after I stammer my thanks. 

I couldn't believe such a random act of kindness from a near-perfect stranger. 

It may have not been, you know, a million dollars or whatever, but it sure made my day.

Hoping your Valentine's Day was sweet, wonderful and chocolate-covered,

--Mollywobbles

 

Asisstant Manager Hell Extreme: Working For Two Douchey Ones Dating Each Other

Hello everyone! I've just stumbled upon this site, and after reading about 20 pages decided to tell a few of my own regarding awful coworkers. I'll call myself StudioSlave for now, because I work in a photography studio.

Now I love my job. Photography is my passion, and most of the people are great to work with. Most of them. The two assistant managers...not so much.

And the real kicker?

They're dating each other. So of course all their vacations are the same.

Anyways, I have a couple stories about them. So story one is about the chick AM, I'll call her BigAM. She has always seemed to have a problem with me, and always has an attitude with everyone, including customers.

One day she gets a call from a custy complaining that someone didn't give her the coupon we had, and said it was me. Now we have to ask at the sales stations, where pictures are viewed and selected, if they have this coupon. If they don't I say "oh it's no big deal, some people just got it mailed" and move on...or if the custy was extra nice and spending a lot I would put it on anyways.

So anyways, this custy said I'm the one who didn't give her her coupon. Now keep in mind I haven't had any trouble all morning, which is when she said she was in. Apparently this custy starts getting angry and yelling, causing BigAM to get HER panties in a knot and start yelling back.

Not the best way to handle the situation. Finally the custy asks for BigAM's name and hangs up. This is when the s*** really hits the fan. BigAM starts SCREAMING at ME, about how it's all my fault that she's going to lose her job.

This tantrum full of f-bombs was performed in front of all the customers...and their children.

And I just stood there shocked. I'm not the one who screamed and swore at the lady! Turns out it wasn't even me the lady was talking about, and she had never even been in that morning.

Yet still I apologized to HER. And she never said sorry.

This sort of freaking out happens more than necessary for someone in an AM position, or anyone in retail for that matter.

Second story is about her boyfriend, ToolAM.

Now normally, he's an ok guy. But like his lovely gf BigAM, he too has freakout moments. During Christmas time, it's busy obviously. Custys get impatient. It was the end of the day and thankfully I was ending with a super nice lady, well behaved heavenspawn and all.

I had finished taking her pictures and was looking for a computer to open up, to view them. I casually asked ToolAM if there was anyone else waiting, to which he yelled "I don't know!" (which he SHOULD), and walked away in a huff. So I was keeping an eye on the computer situation, reassuring my custy that it would just be a little bit longer, when ToolAM looks and me and yells, "Just chill out StudioSlave, Oh My God!".

Now I didn't say a word to him after my reasonable question. I was quietly standing there. My custy, bless her heart, says she is so sorry, and I wasn't saying or doing anything to provoke that, and how awful to be treated like that.

I just played it down, saying the holidays are stressfull, but inside I'm weeping with joy at this beautiful woman. She ends up telling my manager, that I was the only one she saw not freaking out and stressing out other custys. It definately made me feel so much better to know I wasn't the only one who thought every one was over the top!

Till next time,

--StudioSlave

 

Awesome Tippage

 

 

 

Small Custy Comments About Bread Name and Receives Gift Card From Manager

From Bakery Bitch: Management being nice to adorable custys, hopefully it'll make RHU smile!

 

 

 

Hellspawn N.A.T. Gets Told By Awesome Manager At The Magic Kingdom

So, today was fun.

I literally opened EVERY location in the land of tomorrow (not that it wasn't fun) and had a pretty good time.

The following story involves that rarest of breeds: a manager with a backbone.

See, recently, we got a new manager in our little section of the kingdom, who has been with the company for several years and has previously worked at table service restaurants at some of the swankier hotels.

To be honest, this guy is an awesome manager that I got along with pretty much as soon as I met him. He's just as dorky as I am, he's pretty upbeat, he constantly looks for ways to make things more efficient without trying to overstep his bounds. He's a pretty cool guy.

Now, today, at the hot dog stand, I find out after I went on a potty break that there was a... well, an unruly guest one of the registers next to mine.

I hear from the cashier, A, about how the guest came up and told her that our custodians had thrown away three trays of her food, and she wanted it replaced. That, to both me and her, immediately sent up a red flag.

So, A asks her for a receipt for the order. The girl says that her sister took in on a ride with her. Again, red flag.

She asks the girl how the meal was paid for. The guest says she doesn't know because her dad paid for it. She didn't have a receipt, she didn't know how the meal was paid for, and she expects us to replace three trays worth of food just because she said so???

A said no. The girl threw a FIT and A immediately went and called for a manager. Fortunately for A, and me (I was next to the register when the following happened), Cool Guy Manager (CGM) is the one who steps to the window to address the situation.

So, he walks up and the following happens:

Cool Manger: Yes, I'm the manager here. How may I help you?

ANAT (attempted NAT): Yes, I was here, and the cleaners threw away three trays worth of food, and the girl that

was here earlier was giving me a hard time about getting it replaced. I've been waiting here for hours, and in line for twenty minutes, and my brothers and sisters are starving and we just want the food replaced.

Cool Manager: Okay, do you have a receipt?

ANAT: No, my sister has it on the ride.

Cool Manager: Okay, do you know which register your ordered from?

ANAT: No, my dad did it.

Cool Manager: Okay, well, I need some information so we can replace your order properly, so, which ride is your sister on? Or, perhaps you can go getyour dad?

ANAT: Really? Can I speak to the REAL manager?

Cool Manager: I am the manager, and I'd be happy to help you.

ANAT: But it's JUST FOOD. My brothers and sisters are starving, I thought this was Disney where dreams come true and magic happens, and our food got thrown away and we need it replaced and we've already had a long wait and a hard time with the other girl, so will you just replace it?

[HERE COMES THE BEST PART]

Cool Manager: At this point, without a receipt, no, I can not.

HOLY SHIT A MANAGER ACTUALLY TOLD A GUEST AT DISNEY NO! FUCKING AMAZING. The poor ANAT stomped off with a huff, Cool Guy Manager shrugged, and the whole thing was over. I walked over to it after it was over and gave him a high five for handling the situation in a very calm and professional matter while still refusing to let a girl scam out of god knows how many dollars worth of food.

May you all be blessed with similar managers. Until next time, have a magical day!

--MouseMastered

 

Decent Custy Encounter

Got a short one for you guys.

So, I was in WalFart the other night with Foofy Sparklepants. We got our shit and headed up to the registers, and in front of us was this girl who was buying what looked like DVDs and some computer games. But one of those games wasn’t ringing up, and she looked devastated, like she really wanted the thing.

The cashier said it wasn’t in the system, they weren’t even supposed to have them on the shelves.

OF COURSE the girl said something like ‘There’s a lot of them back there, though!’ I saw a shit storm on the horizon and tried to change lanes to avoid the screaming, when she really surprised me.

All she said was ‘Whatever. I’m not gonna throw a tantrum over a darn video game. I ain’t two.’

I think there might be some decent custy’s left, after all!

--Terah

Fast Food Custy Shows Appreciaton After Cashier Picks Up Bill Shortage

Hey RHU’ers! Midnight Doctor here.

For those of you who don’t remember me, I work for a restaurant that specializes in selling chicken that’s finger-lickin’ good.

Just recently, we transitioned from a corporate store to a franchise. I received two paychecks from my manager, so I went to go bank those babies in so I can pay bills and buy some Christmas presents for my friends.

But anyhoo, I have a tale of an awesome customer! They still exist, hurray! So today while I was working front counter, a customer came in and asked to see one of my co-workers, whom I shall call Kick-Ass Prep or KAP for short.

KAP wasn’t on shift until 4pm, so I told the customer this. He tells me that he came in yesterday to order a meal for his lunch break and was short about $1.40 so KAP went ahead and waived the rest of his fees, told him that it was alright, and gave him his meal anyway.

Apparently, this customer was so grateful, that he came in looking for her to pay the $1.40 that he owed and left KAP a VIP Movie Pass for one of the local theaters.

My manager and I were floored. I’ve never had a customer come in and do this kind of thing before. He was a really great guy and wouldn’t accept the change back for what he paid.

It’s nice to know that there are some customers out there who are very kind and appreciate some of the little things we retail slaves do.

Stay strong people! Life gets better.

--Midnight Doctor

 

A Fast Food Custy From Heaven

From StarbitchSoldier:

When I worked solely overnight I would get a lot of people who were not always nice, but there was always this one lady I will call Custy From Heaven coming through after work who was just the sweetest person ever!

Always polite and never got upset if her order took a little longer than usual since not everything is prepared in advance. She even wouldn't mind chatting while her order was cooking. (When you work with only one other person and you're both doing separate cleaning if the whole time, you don't get a vocal outlet.)

To me, she is the perfect example of a wonderful customer. Hopefully she starts coming through during the day. :)

May all your custys be like Custy From Heaven,

--StarBitchSoldier

 

Outlet Mall Shocker: Undercharged Custy Wants To Save His Soul

Dearest RHU,

It’s Satellite Slut again, however with a quick name change.  I actually got fired (as I explained I wouldn’t come back because it was a horrible environment) and they basically told me I was fired.  Okay.  So now you can call me Bashful Bird!  I still haven’t heard anything from any jobs, but whatever.  Things will work out if they are meant to work out.

This story is back a little while ago, when I worked at an outlet clothing store.  Now our store was well known for selling EVERYTHING for 50% less than what most chains would make you pay.  So we were pretty cheap. 

I was the front desk clerk (see: fancy words for cashier), and this gentlemen around 25 came in and plopped his bag on my counter.  He seemed a little guilty, so I smiled and asked how I could help him. 

Guilty Young Man (GYM):  “I bought these the other day.”  He pulls out a pair of flip flops.  “And.. well.  There was a pink tag on top that said 19.99.  But I knew that was a price increase, because I was there the day before and saw they were 15.99… I pulled off the tag… and the cashier gave me the price on the shoes… I’m so sorry.”

Me (almost laughing):  “Oh goodness, well, thanks for being honest!  What would you like me to do?”  (Keep in mind at this point, I wouldn't have asked him to pay the additional $5.  It's our rule that up to $20 we kinda just roll it off of our shoulders.)

GYM:  “Would… it be possible for me to return them and buy them for the correct price?  It will save my soul.”  

Me:  -giggling-  “Sure, sir.  I can do that.”

So sometimes, even when you’re in a seriously high shrink store, you can get a custy that not only makes your day, but actually comes forward when he’s wrong.  

-- Bashful Bird

 

Compassionate Custy Says Working On Christmas Should Be Illegal

From Fabric Faerie:

Hey everyone,

Sorry it's been a while - I escaped Christmas hell by not going back to work at my store this season. I've just got too much else to do, and thanks to a paid internship, I can handle the lack of income for a couple weeks. I've got a few stories saved up, but those can wait a bit longer.

The point of this little note is to share with you all something surprising I overheard my mother tell my dad on the way home tonight. Now, usually my mother is fairly entitled. She maintains some sense of realism, but overall she gets uselessly upset if a store doesn't have what she wants or if there's a line more than one person long, and god forbid if there's traffic on the way there or home.

So, she really surprised me tonight when she was discussing Starschmuck's being open on Christmas day. Her exact phrasing, which she apparently shared with the slave helping her a few days ago, was that working on Christmas should be illegal.

I suppose it comes from how things were back in her day growing up - shops were closed on Sundays, and Holidays were actually recognized as family time. But I guess it just goes to show that sometimes even the entitled ones can have a silver lining, or something equally as cheesy.

Hopefully everyone's holiday didn't suck too overmuch,

--Fabric Faerie

 

Heartwarming Custy Experience at Hellmart

From Grocery Deli Slave:

With all the negativity that happens to employees working in retail during the holiday season, here is something wonderful that happened to me last night at Hellmart.

While on lunch a lady in front of me was buying Christmas for an "adopted" family. She only had so much $$$ to spend.

She was SO happy that she got everything on the list that the kids had asked for. Now here's the best part-her purchases came up to the exact amount of $$$ she had!

Not a penny over or short but the exact amount! It was kind of an awesome sight to see her doing the happy dance.

Hope everyone survives the holidays.

--Grocery Deli Slave

 

Custy Makes Hilarious Comment About Flagship Outdoor Clothing Store

Hello all!

Yeah, it's been a while. The two biggest reasons for that are: Work pretty much tires this old fart out, and I'm a CHAMPION procrastinator.

Life at J.J. Legume has been, and continues to be, a blast! My co-workers are funny, energetic and very conscientious. And with lines of custys literally out the door, those traits come in real handy. 

A few observations:

- A few customers have recognized me from my years at Lord & Taylor (both shops are part of the same mall) and mentioned, "This place really seems to suit you better!"

- Here at Legume, pretty much everything is the house brand. This took some getting used to, since back at L&T clothing was grouped according to manufacturer, Polo here, Lacoste over there, etc. And because everything is pretty much the house brand, I've had to memorize all the northwoods-inspired names for all the shirts, pants, jackets and coats.

- Computers around the store allow customers and employees to look up various items. This brings to light the fact that not that many people (yours truly included) are as computer-literate as they thought.

- Legume prides itself on its 100% customer satisfaction guarantee. Most people take that in the spirit in which it's meant. Others however take that as a challenge to scam the system. Take the skeevy-looking dude with the green teeth who came in recently to return a pair of 10-year(!) old boots. "Can I get that refund in cash?"

- "Do you need gift receipts or boxes?" 

That's not really a difficult question, is it? But judging from the blank stares I've been getting, you'd think I'd just asked them to solve Fermat's Last Theorem.

- When an item in the catalog has the notation "Catalog sales only", it means it's not available in the store! Please don't wail and gnash your teeth and tell me, "We drove here from Tierra del Fuego and you're telling me you don't have it?"

- All my co-workers are WAY more physically fit than I am. I blame the years at Lord & Taylor working my last nerve for that. Anyway, it's like being a national park ranger. I was eating my lunch yesterday ( a store-bought microwaved lasagna) when a co-worker commented, "Eww, that's stuff's just packed with preservatives, ya know!?" I just grinned and said, "Well, right now it's preserving me!"

- And lastly, an elderly gent came in the other day with his hot Asian nurse? companion? bodyguard? He was looking for several specific items, which I helped him find.

As he was making his way to the registers, he asked me, "Have you ever been to Legume's main store?"

I allowed as how I hadn't.

"Well, you really ought to go", he said. "They're all stoned up there! Every single one of 'em! I think that's just GREAT! You have yourself a great day and thank you for your help!"

...and the dance goes on.

Peace.

--Joe the Cigar Guy

6 Things To Be Thankful For In Retail Hell

Hello RHU! 

It's the Crankie Cashier and I am back to work... just in time for Black Friday too yayyyy :/. Anyway work has been kind of fun recently and as much as I bitch to anyone who will hold still long enough (sorry Dad and roommates) I do have a lot to be thankful for. So I figured I would make a list.

1. Boss Lady, the supervisor of my department. She constantly goes out of her way to make life easier for us cashiers. She fixes computer problems, schedules (not at all part of her job) problems between people, and still manages to put up with all the personalities in the front end. She has our backs and we know it. She is one of the main reasons i have held off on getting another job, because well, managers are usually assholes.

2. The coworkers who do not have sticks up their asses and do their jobs. They make horribly boring stretches of work amusing with jokes and bouncy balls. They make amusing faces when old men touch your ass. Not to mention the hours of drunk jokes. Yes we all piss each other off, but for the most part we are in hell together so we might as well make the best of it.

3. The regulars. Yup they are weird, and sometimes smell odd. And stare at my boobs... a lot. But they are usually in a good mood and willing to wait patiently while i fix problems for them (like the old ladies in diner dash). Not to mention I can swear around them. Sometimes it just feels really good to drop a good swear word in the middle of a shift.

4. My managers, when I say no discount they back me up (usually). So in your face you cheap bastards.

5. Idiots, yeah they are annoying, but they make for good stories and are good for a laugh.

6. Polite people... there is a special place in heaven for these people.

Tis all for now, I am sure I will be back to my usual bitching soon. Good luck with the Christmas Crazies.

--The Crankie Cashier

Random Act of Retail Kindness: Custy Gives Driver $120 Holiday Tip!

Music Girl here, submitting a story on behalf of my boyfriend, Dragonman. It isn't quite "retail," but it's close.

Dragonman has worked in retail for years, as a manager and regular employee. Now, however, he works as a truck driver, doing "local" heavy haul deliveries (he hauls heavy machinery all over the state of Texas).

Today, he was delivering a mobile home (an unusual item for him to carry) to a town a couple of hours away. When he gets there, the little old ladies he's delivering to don't know how to drive it, so instead of just leaving it at the drop site, he offers to drive it down the road to where it's going to be sitting. As they're giving him a ride back to his truck, one of them tries to give him a small, rolled up bundle of cash as a tip. At first he refuses, but she insists and he takes it.

When he gets back in his truck, he counts the money, and she's given him a $120 tip.

As a truck driver, he gets paid commission on every load, and it's not typical for any of the clients to tip, since he normally delivers to businesses. So, for a load he normally wouldn't have ran, and by doing just a little bit of extra work to help someone out, he got a pretty nice bonus.

It's nice to see that some people do appreciate those of us who work to make their lives easier. :-)

--Music Girl

 

Custy Appreciation Encounter At The Bell

Hi, RHU. First time poster, etc.

My name's Bellboy: I work at a certain Mexican fast food chain, and today I bring to you not a tale of woe, but a story about a nice custy that made my day.

I rolled on into work one evening not expecting anything out of the ordinary to happen. Before clocking in, I checked the store report (I'm not sure what it's actually called, it's a series of papers that show how the store's been doing in terms of service and things like that), which we have displayed on a wall, and read this:

"Bellboy is a very polite and very respectful young man. He was very pleasant. It's not very often you visit a fast food restaurant and are greeted by someone who really enjoys his job."

I was grinning for the rest of my shift. It's a good feeling knowing that I'm making people feel welcome whenever they come in!

--BB

 

The Silver Lining of Retail Hell

From Popcorn Pit Slave:

This past Saturday was the craziest day at the toy store. I open the store at 9:30, and that was the quietest it was all day.

The store was so packed with customers, I could not greet any of them. There was just no room to move! At noon, my coworker came in to help out and let me have a lunch break, which would have been helpful if she hadn't come in sick! I ran off to the food court, at fast, came back to eat, and sent her home to sleep (and not pass on her death germs to me). Which means I was alone for 8 hours in the store with the big crowd of custys. No bathroom breaks, no water, no help. Stuff happened.

We have a huge plush giraffe at the front of the store, so I had to tell everyone under the age of 30 not to ride it (because they would actually try).

The network had some sort of techno-fart, so I ended up accidentally charging a customer twice for the same stuff, and it was the second time I had done this.

At the end of the evening, the scanner crapped out and I had to manually enter everything. It was terrible.

Finally it was getting close to closing time, but a lady came in 5 minutes to close so I couldn't shut the gates or finish sweeping or cash out. This is when it got good.

Ten minutes after close, I was finally checking her out when an excited-looking woman came into the store. I was going to tell her we were closed, when she said, "I want to buy the giraffe!"

What would you do if you were having a crap day and someone comes in and begs to buy the most expensive thing in the store?

SOLD!

So bragging right for the weekend go to me! And both my customers "God-bless-you"-ed me.

Fast-forward to yesterday morning.

My manager phoned to discuss the whole double-charging business. I had told her what had happened and how it happened, and left a note for whoever was there when the custy came back telling her how to do the refund.

I thought we had finished the discussion, but she said, "I talked to my boss about you."

Oh crap.

Double charging a customer twice in a week? I said goodbye to my job and resigned myself to a being flat broke unemployed university grad bride come January.

Then came the news.

Turns out her boss was very impressed about my performance, working alone many days and doing split shifts without complaint, and he decided to give me a raise! Retroactive to the beginning of the month!

So the lesson here is, work hard, and maybe someone will notice your great performance!

Or maybe you will spend your Saturdays telling teenagers not to ride a plush giraffe and counting down until you finally get to go for a pee.

Or maybe both!

Hang in there, fellow retail slaves!

--Popcorn Pit Slave

 

Burger Bitch: I Love My Regular Custys - Especially When They Tell Off Other Custys

I don’t even know where to start with this week, it’s just been a total and complete fucking shitstorm. I haven’t been sleeping that well as of a few weeks ago and I’ve tried everything under the sun to get myself to sleep better, or at all. But nothing seems to be working, which makes my patience level at an all-time fucking low.

Let’s start things off with a small public service announcement; PLEASE BE SPECIFIC WHEN YOU ORDER, IT IS VERY IMPORTANT TO A COFFEE SLAVE. Twice this week, I’ve had customers freak out at me because I messed up their order.

Bitch, it’s not my fucking fault if you’re not specific. Dillfucker the first came through DT a few days back and ordered a large coffee with a small milk. Now, to me, that means a large coffee with a small milk in it. But no, he meant a small coffee AND a small CARTON of milk, so he proceeded to flip the fuck out over the fact that I put milk in his fucking coffee.

The second customer was a middle-aged woman who came up to the counter and asked for “two coffees with milk and one coffee with sugar.” To myself and my coworkers, that meant 3 coffees. My coworker poured them while I attended to a DT order, when I handed her the coffees, she flips her shit and starts SCREAMING at me because she only ordered two coffees.

I offer to repour them if she tells me what she wants in them, but I doubt she could hear me over the sound of how much of an asshole she was. Apparently she wanted one coffee with just milk and one coffee with milk and sugar, which she could have ordered the fucking correct way by saying “Can I have 2 coffees, one with milk and one with milk and sugar.” But I suppose that would have been just too simple. 

Now, I need to tell you guys a story from a few weeks back. We have many regulars and 99% of them are absolutely amazing. One in particular is my favourite.

We’re going to call him John because he looks hella similar to John Goodman. He’s crazy tall, I’m guessing about 6’4 or 6’5, and SUCH a sweetheart. Every morning he comes in and the first thing he says is “My dear, how are you!?” and he just makes my heart melt.

Sometimes he’ll bring his son in with him, who’s about 4 or 5 and he’s the most polite child I’ve ever met. Anywhom, John is the manager of a hardware store just down the road from us, so he comes in 2-3 times a day, but his first time is always about 15 minutes after we open.

He came in a few weeks back, so I get his coffees ready for him (He gets his and one other for whoever opens with him that morning, so I just ask him whose working with him and get theirs ready.) There was another man behind him in line, but he was waiting for a sandwich that my coworker was preparing for him, so I was shooting the shit with John about whatever hockey game was on the night before (I’m Canadian, it’s an everyday occurrence) when the man behind him taps him on the shoulder.

John: “Yes?”

Asshole VonVagDouche: “I was in your store the other day and it was fucking awful! I couldn’t find anything I wanted and your employees were so fucking incompetent!”

John: “Ok, first things first. You just interrupted my conversation, and she was talking. Obviously your parents weren’t fit enough to teach you to NEVER interrupt a lady. Second, maybe if you were more polite, my employees would have been more inclined to help you search for whatever you were looking for. And third, DOES IT FUCKING LOOK LIKE I’M AT WORK TO YOU? NO. I’M GETTING MY COFFEE BECAUSE IT’S 6:15 AM AND I NEED IT TO DEAL WITH ASSHOLES LIKE YOU.”

Asshole VonVagDouche: (Who barely reached 5’5”) “Oh. I-Uh.. Ok.”

I had to turn around to stop from laughing; it was so glorious seeing some fucktrot get his ass ripped to shreds. John even apologized for swearing in front of me and carried on his merry way. When he came back for his second coffee on his break, he told me that if that guy ever gave me trouble, to let him know.

I love my regular customers so much.

--Burger Bitch

Custy Does Random Act of Retail Kindness During Rush In Fast Food Hell

Hey there RHU, another LTRFTW here (Long-Time Reader, First Time Writer).

You can call me Former Farmer, as I spent my formative years working on my father's ranch and hiring myself out to the other farmers in the neighborhood when I needed extra money. I'm in my senior year of college; however, due to the fact that I'm going for a degree in Chemical Engineering, I will be here for a few more years.

Anyway, this past summer, having run through the money I'd saved up during high school, I got a job at the local Barfy's. All in all, I really like the place. Just about everyone is great to hang around with, from the owners to the managers to the other employees, and know how to work hard. The customers, by and large, great too.

Let me introduce you to a few of my fellow slaves. First there is Mama Bear, one of the managers. She can be a real grump when she wants to be, and some of the...bolder employees like to push her buttons. However, she takes it in stride, pushing back just as hard. And as the name I've given her may suggest, she stands up for those in her charge. I have yet to see her give into some crusty's petty demands without a roll of her eyes, and any crusty that has tried to pull a fast one has been met with a swift boot to the butt as she kicks them to the curb.

Next, is Goldilocks, another manager. She is an absolute joy to work with. She is rarely without a smile on her face or a joke on hand, and her cheery attitude is incredibly infectious. She also has a rather unique talent. When faced with an entitled crusty, she can tune out their screeching, going about her work as though there isn't a rabid crusty screaming at her from the other side of the counter.

Then there's Ex-Emo. If I hadn't been told, I would have thought he and Goldilocks were related. Their personalities are so similar it's bizarre, and I sometimes wonder if leaving them close to each other for too long will generate some sort of positive feedback loop. As a plus, he's openly gay, and no one bats an eye. More on that in a second.

Then, there's Mistaken For Gay. MFG is another fun guy (he's the one who usually pushes Mama Bear's buttons) and is, for all appearances, a walking gay stereotype. Fashion conscious, skinny, effeminate voice - the works. Were it not for the fact that he walked in one day with his girlfriend and told me point blank that he's straight, I would never have known. The exact opposite is true for Ex-Emo. He's hefty, loves baseball, and wears mostly black. If he hadn't told me point blank that he was gay, I'd never have known.

Finally, I'll introduce you to Pinkie Pie. No, she doesn't wear pink, and I don't think she even knows about MLP:FiM, but she is so much like Pinkie Pie that it's scary. She has more energy than she knows what to do with, constantly goes off on the strangest tangents, and loves bringing sweets into the break room for the rest of us to share. I'm a fairly stoic guy, and I'm fairly certain she's taken it upon herself to make me laugh whenever she can.

Now, despite having awesome coworkers, it's not all sunshine and daises. There have definitely been some times when the demons of Retail Hell have found their way in, like the guy who wanted to buy a large drink and then fill up his 100-oz. travel mug. (He spent a full five minutes arguing with Mama Bear about it before getting the boot). But, I can say that I genuinely love my job. I plan on sharing my tales of Retail Hell in the near future, but right now I want to leave you with a double rainbow of Retail Kindness that graced the Barfy's lobby today.

Customer Lady: "Excuse me? I've been waiting here for eleven minutes. Is my food ready yet?"

Perplexed, Goldilocks takes a look at her receipt, and, lo and behold, she ordered a trio of side dishes eleven minutes ago and was overlooked in the rush. As Pinkie Pie goes to fix the forgotten order, Goldilocks apologizes to Customer Lady and rings her up for a full refund. 

Moments later, as Pinkie Pie is handing Customer Lady her food and Goldilocks is handing her her money, C. Lady looks genuinely touched at the kind offer and asks that we instead donate her refund to the charity that Barfy's has partnered with.

As all parties walked away from this potentially explosive situation with smiles on their faces, I couldn't help but smile myself. This little act of kindness made an otherwise harried and stressful night into something I'll be remembering for a while.

Well, stay sane fellow slaves.

--Former Farmer signing off.

 

 

Black Friday Tales: Customer's Random Act of Kindness Never Forgotten

Hey there, everyone. Long time reader, blah blah blah.

You all can call me Munchies. It's a nickname I acquired in middle school that just hasn't un-stuck. :) Anyway. With the holiday season approaching (and the dreaded Black Friday *shudders*), I found myself thinking about last year's season, and remembered a bit of kindness that was shown to me.

I work in a fabric/craft store. It was the Saturday right after Black Friday, and I'd been helping a customer with some scissors. She was looking at an expensive pair (made a little less expensive since they were half off that day), and I briefly mentioned that I was planning on buying a pair as soon as my shift was over. I continued helping her, cut her fabric, etc. etc. We had a nice chat and overall she was one of the best customers I'd had all week. She moves on to the checkout and I proceed to help my next customer in line.

"Hey, Munchies!" I hear her yell as she's exiting the front door.

Curious, I go up to see if she needed help with anything else, even though she'd already been rung out.

"Merry Christmas," she says, handing me a store bag with a nice new pair of scissors-the same scissors I'd just sold to her earlier. I honestly believe I went into shock. I thanked her profusely and she left and went about her day.

These were not cheap scissors she'd bought for me. It's not something she HAD to do, but she chose to because she wanted to. I still have them, and still use them. I think thanks to her, I've been sewing more, and getting better.

So thank you, Awesome Lady, for the gift. If you ever read this, I want you to know that I will never forget it!

Have any of you guys had a customer buy you a gift or show you any similar kindness?

--Munchies