Due to the glorious return of the internet, I can start telling my back log of stories! I am gonna split this into two because I must of really offended the retail gods recently, that's the only explanation I have for how much shit I have put up with the past couple of days!
I will start with a story which sets this all up. One of the girls I work with - who I shall call Gurl - booked 4 weeks off to go on holiday, this was approved by Horrid Manager, all fine and dandy.
Then, the week before her holiday, she handed in her notice. Now, I know this is a little bitchy to do, but technically it is allowed. But Horrid Manager went mad.
She denied ever having seen any holiday forms (she's been really good at doing this recently) and swore blind she didn't approve the holiday.
So guess who's been calling in sick to all her shifts...
Anyway, I was scheduled to work for an hour last Friday. Now, this was ridiculous. Due to my wages, and the distance I live from the store, I actually lose money if I don't work for at least 2 hours. So fuck off was I going to do a 1 hour shift.
With the advice from my supervisor, I tell Horrid Manager that I am going to work 3 hours that day, or not at all. I get a text on Thursday saying "Work 3 hours."
All fine and dandy, I go in for my shift, happy as Larry - there were hardly any customers due to us being the only store in the whole town that was open that late - and I am serving one of the few customers when Horrid Manager walks behind me.
"You're working all day tomorrow"
Now, on Saturday I was supposed to be running a charity event that, for complicated legal reasons, could not go ahead if I wasn't there. So, I run after Horrid Manager and have this conversation:
Science Ninja: "I can't work tomorrow, I have something else I have to do."
Science Ninja: "I am really sorry, I can't do that. I am running a charity event!"
Horrid Manager: "When does it start?"
Science Ninja: "I need to be in (town an hours drive away) at 2."
Horrid Manager: "Work 9-2."
Science Ninja: "No, I need to be in TOWN at 2."
She then proceeds on this massive spiel about how I have no work ethic, I don't care about the company, I never take extra shifts (BULLSHIT I cancelled a long planned family holiday to work shifts for this bitch next week) blah blah blah until she finally wears me down to agreeing to work 9-1. I tell her, flat out, that I AM leaving at one o'clock, no exceptions.
I go home, and shout at my (long suffering) boyfriend in the car on the way back, I am so angry.
Anyway, I roll my fat arse out of bed on the Saturday morning, apologise to boyfriend that I am getting up so early on his lie in day, and head into work.
Walk in and Horrid Manager has scheduled me to work the full day. Huh.
Go and find her, she replies with "You agreed to work the whole day."
I inform her that, actually, there are 3 witnesses to me saying I can only work until 1. Find 2 witnesses, phone the other, they all agree with me.
At 12, Horrid Manager comes over and says it's too busy, I am not allowed to leave. I tell her I am leaving in an hour.
She then smirks, and leaves me on the department on my own for the next hour. 1 o' clock comes. No one has come to take me off the department. If I leave the department unattended, I would get fired. I see Horrid Manager's plan. I phone to try and get someone to cover, no one is answering. In the end, at 1:30, I snag an unwitting coworker who is walking past, explain the situation to her (by this point I am hyperventilating in panic), and leave.
I got to the charity event (just) in time, so that was all good, and I wasn't fired when I was talking to the top Manager on Sunday, so it all went ok I presume (apart from the intense stress they put me through, of course.)
Sigh. I will return to you with my other story if my internet keeps playing nice!
May all your managers not be made of knob cheese,
--The Science Ninja.