So. Bit of back story. We run a shop which is open from 9am to 9.30pm. However, we have a stargazing program that goes from 6pm to 10pm, then we bring in the telescopes and go home. We're open every day of the year.
Every night, a car rolls in at 9.55pm. We call them the "inevitable nine fifty fivers".
So the 955ers get out. Asks how he can use the telescopes. I tell him that, "You don't, we do - but have a look through because that's why they're around."
Then one of them tries to go inside (our doors were open to bring some stuff inside from outside). I tell him we're closed. He insists that because Google told him we're open until 10 we should let him in.
Me: No sir, I can't do that. We're closed.
Him: But I just want a map!
Me: Yes. We have maps for sale, but we're closed.
Him: Oh they're for sale?
Me: Yes, they are, and we're closed. You may look through a telescope if you'd like, they're out here for a few more minutes.
Him: So I can't just come inside?
There are only a few times when I've wanted to tell someone to fuck off while I'm at work.
So I did it in a nice way. Kind of.
Me: No, sir. Absolutely not. It is strictly prohibited and not least of all we are closed. The money is away and counted. We've closed up everything and taken inside the carts with the water and such. There's nothing left and your girlfriend is running to the car because it's freezing cold out. We are not open until 10. You are mistaken. And no, you can't continue to drive to the summit. It's probably best you just head home as there's nothing left to do here.
And so they did. They left. And all was good again.