I have now been a casual worker at a fast food restaurant with a certain red haired clown for a mascot for about 3 and half years.
This is my first job, and being very shy I thought a customer service job would help build my confidence... if only I had RHU stories back then to dissuade me.
I started off quite meek; I'd do exactly what I was told when I was told, being rather intimidated by my 'superiors'.
One day while wiping down tables in the dining area a mum approached me; her kid had informed her there was piss in the playground (a monster of plastic tubes and slides with about 3 levels meant to keep the hell spawn occupied outside).
This wasn't covered in my recent training, so I timidly told a manager. He looked at me and said 'well you better get cleaning'.
I could practically feel my pupils dilate as I asked how to go about this, and was told to take some paper towels and garbage bags.
Now these playgrounds have a height limit; if you're too big you're not allowed in. Being a 16 year old, 65kg girl, I very much exceeded this limit, and while a number of much smaller 14 year old employees would be better suited, I didn't want to question anyone.
So I followed the kid of the mum who had first told me about the mess up through a tube I was much too big for.
I got stuck half way.
The little girl and a number of other Hell Spawn still rampaging around inside the playground found this hilarious and laughed in the high pitched, grating way only under 10's can.
I dislodged myself and finally made it to the landing full of piss.
As I started to soak up what was about 3cm deep of the stuff I was informed there was more on the level above me.
Looks like some little prick pissed down the central shaft that connected all the levels.
To cap it off, I ran out of paper towels on that first level and had to work my way back out to get more, then climb all the way back in.
This is all enclosed by plastic mind you; imagine a brightly colored enclosed plastic space full of piss, with laughing Hell Spawn still running circles round you.
Yep, that's right, the manager didn't even clear the playground of kids and close it off while a bio-hazard was being cleaned up.
Eventually I wormed back out of the playground with my garbage bag full of piss soaked paper towels.
I vigorously scrubbed off my hands and arms with a great quantity of soap while some coworkers laughed at me.
I was then told 'they can't force you to clean up human waste you know. You don't have to touch blood, piss, shit or vomit if you don't want, haha'.
Since then I've developed somewhat more of a spine.