The following tale is 100% true, I cannot make this shit up. I’m just not that creative.
I was working with Squeegee today. She’s a bright girl, but she’s… she’s a Squeegee. I think the bleach went to her brain at some point, I really do. I adore the girl but, still.
We were talking and she was play poking at my face. I laughed and said ‘If you poke me in the eye, I’m gonna bite your finger off.’
She laughed back. ‘You can’t do that, Terah! That’d be bestiality!’
I just stared at her for a long time, until she got the sense she’d said something stupid.
Squeegee: That’s the right word, isn’t it?
Terah: What? No, Squeegee, just… what? NO! SQUEEGEE! CAN-NI-BAL-ISM!
Squeegee: You know what I meant.
Terah: Yes, did YOU know what you meant?
Squeegee: Well, they’re the same thing.
Terah: Bestiality is where you fuck a dog! Cannibalism is where you nom another person!
That was just my wtf moment to end all wtf moments.
--Terah The Gas Slave