Fitting Room Door Sign
Fitting Room Door Sign

Retail Words and Phrases That Suck

Bannedwords_2Since we are venting about Fitting Rooms this month, RHU recommends a few words and customer questions that should be BANNED in every fucking fitting room from here to china.

Words that should be banned are any that hold a meaning of us having to put away the piles of fucking clothes people try on. Here are a few slang retail words some stores use:


We have no idea why this word was invented to describe fitting room cleaning duty, but the toilet and garbage similarities with dump seem like no coincidence. More often than not, what's left behind in a fitting room can resemble both.


Supposed to mean return to stock, but we all know it really means Retards Trash Store.


Go to hell. Goback yourself!


It's meaning should be exclusive to trees and penises. Not merchandise that needs to be re-shelved.

Questions that should be banned:

Asking to try on underwear.

This is just plain gross, but people still ask. A good comeback to say to a customer is, "Sure you can try on underwear, only you have to use the sample underwear everyone else uses."

Asking to take 300 items into the fitting room.

Like we're gonna say, "No problem!" to some bitch taking in this many items so they can leave a tsunami of clothes for us to fold and re-hang. Thank god, most Stores have limits because of Nasty Ass Thief issues.

Asking for help with trying on the clothes.

If anyone asks you this - run for your fucking retail life! - because the person that will ask you this will not be hot and you will most likely see them naked, which could cause you to barf up the shitty mall food you had for lunch.

Asking to try the same thing on in 5 different colors.

Makes us want to say: "The green is not going to fit different from the purple, dumb ass!"

Asking to bring a friend in the fitting room.

Most of the time they don't ask, they just do it. And most of the time they leave the place trashed just like in many of the vile stories RHU Retail Slaves have recounted this month. If more than one person goes into a fitting room on your watch our suggestion to you is to pick up the department phone, dial 911 and tell them terrorists have just entered a fitting room.



You know what sucks, our store didn't have a limit on what you could take in the fitting rooms! They basically said we just had to keep an eye on everyone coming in and out. Yeah right. On top of the price changes, floorset changes, and every other change Corporate's got us doing. We have time to watch people come in and out of the fucking fitting rooms?!

Oooh. Our pet peeve was them trying on the same thing in 5 different colors. It's the worst. Just hold the fucking thing up to your face and see if you like it or not. Jesus!

Also, we didn't have a policy on how many people could go in one fitting room.



Oh, and I do remember "gobacks" or "putbacks". I used to pick on this stupid associate we had, she always said "Are these putbacks?" I always thought that was gay sounding lmao. I'd just saying their fitting room clothes.

LA Retail Slut

One time during a sale there was a mound of clothes in one fitting room up to my chest! I kid you not! It took five of us an hour to put away. fucking sucked.

retail slut

Can i see this in all 96 colors!!!!!! Fuck them!!!! NOOOOOOOO!!!!! I love you guys:)


And I learned the hard way not to help them try anything on.


We once had a guy return USED underwear. The manager was not happy and did not hide the fact that he was totally repulsed by having to touch the unwashed used underwear!

I love it when some people brought in 4 pairs of jeans in the same size! The reason? "some size 6's fit differently!"


I took my husband to the store the other day to pick up a new bikini. He came down the hallway of the fitting room with me and then tried to follow me in. I told him under no uncertain terms that he was to wait OUTSIDE and I would open the door to show him the suit. When he asked why I said "I saw too many trashy-ass people go into the fitting room together doing God-knows-what in my day to let you do it now." He acted like he understood but I think he was still bummed. ^_-


my partner and i go into dressing rooms together pretty much every time we shop, i never thought it would bother the staff... Then again, we've both been retail slaves, so our process is, try it on, judge, if it's a reject, hand it to the other who neatly folds it or returns it to the hangar.

If the dressing room is too small for both of us, I normally end up waiting outside, giving in to my OCD. (I've organized an entire Old Navy Wall properly by color and size in the past. I'm still not sure whether they hate me or love me there)


When I used to work the fitting room (before escaping to Electronics) I had a woman chew me out because we had instituted a policy where jackets and coats could not be tried on in a fitting room due to Nasty Ass Thieves.

"Well, how am I supposed to know if it looks good with the skirt?"


So she yelled "FUCK IT!" and left.

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