Signage Fail

Amusement Park Hell Remembered: Crusty Has Tantrum Over Funnel Cake

RD7 Hey RHU!

CiCi here with a tale of my very first Crazy Custy Encounter.

It actually happened almost three years ago at my first job, and frankly I can't believe I forgot about it.

So here goes. Long story is long, sorry.

My first job was at a small local amusement park, "Hell on Earth," as I affectionately refer to it. This park hires kids as young as fourteen, but fourteen and fifteen year olds are pretty much stuck in food and beverage because of child labor laws (I think that's the reason).

I was fifteen, so I was hired as a food and beverage worker. The park opened the first weekend in May, and I remember working it and thinking all day, "this job is going to SUCK."

Side rant: the management at that place is the worst ever. My orientation the week prior to the season opening consisted of being in a room with other food and beverage workers and going over food safety laws, and then being given a quick tour of the park. That's it. We weren't shown where each food stand was or what they were called, or how to work a register. I was given a crash course in register on my first day, and it was SO FUCKING COMPLICATED. Also, I wandered around the park to find my assigned location because I had NO IDEA what the schedule was referring to. /end side rant

This story takes place on maybe my fourth day of work, which would have been the second weekend of May. The park was fairly crowded because it was a nice day. And of course we had a long line. I was on register, and there were maybe four other employees plus a supervisor hanging around because we were overstaffed that day.

I was having a LOVELY time on register because the prices for food inside the park were ridiculously high and people weren't allowed to bring food in, which forced them to buy from the food stands.

I had this conversation multiple times:

Customer: Hi, I'll have a small ice cream cone, and two Diet Cokes.

Me: Okay, that'll be $7.50.

Customer: Why?

Me: ... OCTOCAROL 152

Customer: Never mind, that's too expensive. *walks away*

I would then be forced to call my supervisor to void out the order, because as an employee I wasn't allowed to do that.

Meanwhile the line of people would be growing more and more impatient. The stand I was working was the only place in the park that made funnel cakes, and since the majority of park visitors are tourists, they are anxious to have a REAL funnel cake (the area I'm from is well known for funnel cakes).

And of course, one of our two fryers was out of commission that day. Of course, this meant that EVERY SINGLE FUCKING CUSTOMER ORDERED A FUNNEL CAKE.

Even with my supervisor working as fast as she could on our one functioning fryer, the orders piled up to the point where it was about a half hour wait for a funnel cake.

So then when people would order one, I would tell them as a courtesy, "Just so you know, it's going to be about a 30 minute wait for the funnel cake."

They would then say either "That's fine, I'll wait," or "Oh, never mind then."

So people are waiting for their funnel cakes. One lady who waited the full 30 minutes to get hers came up and ordered another one because the first one was so good.

And then it happened...

A woman steps up to my register and orders a few drinks and of course, a funnel cake.

I respond, "Okay, the funnel cake is going to be about a 30 minute wait."

The woman, who had been nice up to this point, looks at me and says "WHAT?"

Startled, I repeat that there is a 30 minute wait for funnel cakes. The woman, who will henceforth be referred to as Psycho Bitch, FREAKS OUT: "WHY ARE YOU TELLING ME I CAN'T HAVE A FUNNEL CAKE?!?!"

I was speechless, mostly because THAT WASN'T WHAT I WAS SAYING AT ALL, and also because no one had ever blown up at me like that before.  RHSEPT 295

Some people had been short with me, but no one had been so blatantly rude.

Luckily, the first lady (who was waiting at the counter for her second funnel cake) spoke up in my defense. "She didn't say you couldn't have a funnel cake, she was just letting you know that there is a wait."


Perhaps now is the time to mention that Psycho Bitch was a Girl Scout leader who was surrounded by maybe five girls from her troop, all of whom looked to be about eight.

They witnessed ALL of this.

Cool Custy: There are a lot of other people who ordered funnel cakes and they only have one fryer working. The funnel cakes are really good; they're worth waiting for. I'm waiting for my second one, actually.

Psycho Bitch: (muttering) Well, that's a long time to wait, I don't know if I want to wait that long, half an hour is ridiculous...

Cool Custy: They're doing the best they can. Give them a break, they're just kids. I know how it is, I used to work in the restaurant industry.

Psycho Bitch: *snorts and mutters under her breath* "Used to"....


Psycho Bitch: *snorts and mutters again* "Single mother."

Cool Custy: *gets closer* YES, I LEFT MY BOYFRIEND BECAUSE HE MOLESTED MY DAUGHTER!!!! I left my job to take care of her so I wouldn't have to leave her with people like YOU while I worked!

Psycho Bitch: I hope she's not with people like you either! (which doesn't make sense... because obviously the daughter IS with people like her mom... namely, her mom)

This was followed by unintelligible screaming on both of their parts. I had been standing at the register this whole time and was now close to tears because I was so freaked out.

My manager threatened to call security and they both moved off to the side and toned it down a little, but not much.

A man who had been waiting behind Psycho Bitch stepped up to place his order, but because of Psycho Bitch's yelling, I couldn't hear him even though he was standing a foot away. RHSEPT 522

My manager did end up calling security before it escalated to physical violence, but the thing is that Single Mom walked off before security got there, and I saw Psycho Bitch talking to security and crying, probably playing the victim.

SERIOUSLY?!? You're a fucking GIRL SCOUT LEADER, you cuntnugget! For the love of Ray J, you're supposed to be setting an example for those girls! AGHAGHBLARG.

I didn't actually get angry about this until after I got my second job and toughened up some. When I thought back, the memory pissed me off beyond belief.

There's no excuse for acting like that. Although the pure absurdity of it also makes me laugh: the fact that Psycho Bitch started freaking out needlessly over funnel cakes and ended up in a fight that got VERY personal very quickly, due to her own bitchery.

I only lasted the month of May at that job, and I only worked weekends, so I probably only worked there for about six days total. I think I gave my notice at the end of my fourth shift.

One of the best days of my life was the day I walked out of that place knowing I never had to go back I swore I'd never work in food again, and I haven't.

I've now worked at my second job (in children's clothing) for seventeen months, and I'm much happier. Not that I haven't encountered other custys, I CERTAINLY have, but I think something about ordering food brings out the very worst in people. Hunger + custys = BAD.

Also, I love my coworkers and management is MUCH more competent at my current job.

We're kind of like a family, and our nickname for our store manager is "Mama" because we're all her kids, since she has none of her own.

:D Much love,




I HATE people like that. They either don't or won't listen, they act like they can get what they want by making up their own "truth" about what happened (aka lying) and then they think they can just insult people who they think are beneath them. This sort of venal superiority that thinks it can accuse people of anything in order to get their own way, and somehow believes it can get away with it is one of the three things that completely short-circuits my brain. If I had been in your place I would have been fired for beating her over the head with the broken fryer.


Who tells a complete stranger that their daughter was molested? This whole exchange is unbelievable.


whow, crazy, must have been quite a show!
and now I need to try to make funnel cake at home.. I've never even seen one but they do sound good!

@ CHP , I guess in the heat of the moment she only wanted to mark her point, a normal person would probably have stoped screaming and would have gone 'uhhhh, sorry.' in an embarased way, not this one.

Mafia blimp

Ah.... good old themeparks with crazies. Sounds almost exactly like the Six Fucks I used to work at. I can only imagine what the other parks go through.


@CHP...In the heat of a exchange people say things they wouldn't normally say. I've been there myself and witnessed it as well.


I don't blame you. My first job was food service for the big M and after leaving there I swore I'd never work food service again. I haven't, though I'm tempted now that I need a second job and fast food joints are the only places around that are hiring.... -_-


Amazingly enough, I never saw a screaming match while working at Hardly's. Come to think of it, I think the craziest thing I ever saw was a skunk in one of the outdoor pizza restaurants at Six Flags. When I alerted the staff, we saw a couple of maintenance guy show up with a big net! My (ex) and I just broke up laughing and scooted to another table a little further away until the skunk scooted under the fence when he saw them coming.


That sounds exactly like the park i worked at >_>


That's just unreal. It's like a real life Jerry Springer episode!

Mouse Mastered

Having worked at a zoo and two theme parks, (merchandise, attractions, and food service respectively - wow, that's the three WORST PLACES to be in any amusement setting), I have to say that people are just fucking crazy about their relaxation time and spend way too much time stressing out about it. Gotta ride these, gotta eat that, need to do this by this time....

It's why most people who visit MK tell me they need a vacation from their vacation. It can be overwhelming at times, and sometimes the tiniest thing is just the straw that broke the camel's back and people go batshit insane.

That being said, I came up with a saying about working at theme parks: It's the daily life of needing a vacation from everybody else's vacation.


Dude, it's -just- a -funnel cake.-


@WMDKitty, you're telling ME. I remember being genuinely terrified because I had never seen an adult throw a temper tantrum before... see, this was back when I was still innocent and thought all adults behaved like... well, ADULTS. Silly me. So I just stood there frozen. If that happened to me now I'd be thinking "HOLY HANNAH WOMAN IT'S A FUNNEL CAKE AND I DIDN'T EVEN SAY YOU COULDN'T HAVE ONE! CALM YOUR SHIT!" I might even have the retail balls to say some of it.

NC Tony

I just wonder if any of those girls told the scoutmasters higher ups what happened. I know I would have stuck around to tell park security exactly what happened and make the psycho bitch look like... well, a psycho bitch. I know if my wife had been there, she would have dropped her voice down, leaned in close and told this psycho something to the effect of "You're lucky you have kids with you right now, otherwise you'd be picking your teeth up off the ground." And trust me, she would have been.


I wish there was a video of this. You honestly could win on AMV with it.

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