Our V'ger Overlord Finds Evidence Of The Newest Species of Custy: Piglets
The Great Dilemma

We Always Knew Barbie Was a Freak Of Nature

Wtfbarbiebag
Pity girl
Skinny girl
What happened to your figure, girl?

Your arms too long
Your porportions, all wrong
Your legs like sticks
You lack weight bearing hips

Pity girl
Skinny girl
What happened to your figure, girl?


Your head too big
Your neck like a twig
Your eyes do amaze
For lack of life in your gaze

Pity girl
Skinny girl
What happened to your figure, girl?

More vapid your smile
Women choke on their bile
Your expression feigned
Complexion cannot be explained

Pity girl
Skinny girl
What happened to your figure, girl?

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(Yes it's probably a shoddy poem, but can you deny its content?)

Comments

The Last Archimedean

If Barbie were human, her measurements would be 39-21-33.

I don't know a single actual human female with measurements like that. And I wouldn't find them physically attractive if I did meet such a female.

photoslave

My 11 year old niece loves when I play "Barbies" with her. Even though we make fun of her proportions as we play.

Skittles

Image search Valeria Lukyanova for a truly Uncanny Valley moment. Last time I looked it was Safe For Work but the images are too diturbing to look often.

The Last Archimedean

Skittles, remind me never to take advice from you on what to look at ever again. I feel a sudden, overpowering need to pour bleach in my eyes. That is just awful.

NC Tony

I would look Skittles, but I want to be able to sleep again.

Skittles

For those who don't want to look but are curious Valeria has undergone plastic surgery and other body mods to look like a doll. The end result is creepy as hell. It also makes you wonder what is wrong in the world to make anyone feel the need to look as inhuman as possible?

photoslave

@Skittles, there was a Yahoo article on her today. I went to check on world news, and there she was! She looks like she belongs in Dreamhouse with Ken!

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