From: Stagathor

I'm working the switchboard of a hospital (worst fucking shift ever)

Me: Thank you for calling hospital, how may I direct your call?

Bitchy patient: I'd like to be connected with so and so's office. And don't put me on that damn recording.

Me: (eye roll) One moment please. (transfer)

Next phone call.

Me: Thank you for calling hospital, how may I direct your call?

BP: No one is answering! I need to cancel my appointment for tomorrow. You're all incompetent!

Me: I'm sorry about that, I just work the switchboard. Let me find out what's going on and off she's even in office today.

BP: Fine, but don't put me on that damn recording.

Me: Well, I have to put you on hold to call her office. The recording is automatic, I have no control over it.

I put her on hold and called the office. I also get no response and she's not showing up as available on our IM system. Tired of dealing with this bitch, I decided to cancel her appointment, even though I'm not supposed to. I pick up her line and she's holding down a button in frustration.

Me: Ma'am, I couldn't reach anyone either, but I'm going to--

BP: This is bullshit! My appointment is tomorrow!!! And I told you not to put me on that fucking recording! 

Me: (losing my patience and cutting off her rant.) I need you to calm down and let me finish my sentence you rudely interrupted. First, stop cursing at me. Second, I told you I have no control over the recording and I told you I needed to put you on hold to find the office admin. Third, before you interrupted me, I was going to say I was going to cancel it for you, even though I'm not supposed to. Now, what is your name and date of birth?

She changed her tune when I told her I'd do what she wanted. I hate the fucking switchboard.

--Stagathor