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Tech Support Hell: "That's Not My Job! Send A Tech!"


Carolanne 009dFrom Ari

I get a call from a woman and she can't get her computer to boot.

Naturally, the first question that everybody hates comes out first thing: "Is it plugged in?"

Imagine my surprise when the woman honestly and directly replies: "No. The cleaning people accidentally unplugged it."

I blink in surprise then say: "All right ma'am. Could you please plug it in and try to boot it?"

Woman: "No."

Me: "I'm sorry? No?"

Woman: "That's right... No. It's not in my job description to plug things in. You send a tech person over here and have him plug it in for me."

I stared blankly at the wall for several seconds.

Jason 002aMe: "Ma'am... just to be sure I understand you right... you can fix this problem, for free and immediately, if you plug the cord into the wall. Instead you want me to send a tech to your company to plug the computer in, which will take a minimum of two hours with our current backlog, and charge you a lot of money for his time?"

Woman: "Yes! And hurry up about it!"

So, I had a tech person drive over forty miles to plug the damn thing into a wall outlet. I also told him to have a word with her boss about the incident. Not that our company minds the money, but usually our techs handle big problems that the average person doesn't deal with and doesn't know how to handle; underground lines, servers, and the like. It was for a very minor fix, and someone with a much more complicated problem was sitting on their thumbs waiting for a tech to finish a five second job fix that took half an hour (plus) to drive to... one way...

The tech reported that he talked to her boss, who apparently got a hilariously pained, eye-twitching expression on his face with every detail that spilled out. The boss very stiffly paid the owed amount, turned with military precision, and told (not asked) the woman to meet him in his office. We never got a call that stupid from that company ever again.





Working for the big red Z phone company, doing internal tech support (I didn't deal with the idiots with their phones, I dealt with the people who had to deal with the idiots with their phones). The company is -very- big on unions. When someone from New York needs a new mouse, instead of 'I have a USB mouse. I will plug in this USB mouse', it's an electrician's job. So, instead of 30 seconds of plugging in the mouse, they called me, I put in a ticket, and two days later (and this is not in any way an exaggeration) an electrician, two apprentices and a guy to wave a flag would show up and plug in the mouse.


A friend of mine had a similar thing happen while working tech support for a company that made treadmills for gyms. Musclehead calls about a treadmill that won't run. "Is it plugged in?" "I don't know, I'm not Technical." It wasn't that he wouldn't plug it in so much as he literally could not tell if it was plugged in or not.

Some people find weightlifting to be intellectually challenging.


"It's not in my job description to plug things in."
Being a not-invalid is not a fucking job; just do the shit yourself. Or must I send someone over to wipe your ass, while I'm at it?

"Yes! And hurry up about it!"
Ahahahaha! Fuck, no. *hangs up*


When I worked for a very large telecom company supporting their whole universe product, I got a call from a guy who couldn't connect to anything, TV and Phone service was out to (The phones were VOIP), no modem, no phone service. Asked him to check the lights on the router and the physical connections. About 5 minutes later, the guy comes back and goes "Hey, I got the power turned off to this part of the house while I do some renovations. Think that might have something to do with it?" I said, Sir, I think we found the problem. Please call back after the power is back on if you're still having trouble


I just cannot understand people like that. If I saw something was unplugged, I'd get on my knees and unplug it. If I called in to tech support without checking only to realize that's what it was, I would be mortified and begging them not to tell anyone.


datawog, I was raised to never contact tech support before doing the 'IT question problems'. Plugged in? Lights on? Restart fix the problem? Cables connected? Leave it for an hour (if it's not anything super important) and see if it fixes itself?

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