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English Is Hard: Somebody Call Samuel L. Jackson For This Idiot

Retail Hell Memories: When a Dumbass Custy Calls the Cops



Carhop here with an old tale of customer lunacy that resulted in the cops being called. By the customer. On my shop.

First a little background. My state currently requires all vehicles to get a yearly safety inspection. For as long as I've been able to drive, the inspectors would give a little sticker to go on the windshield beside your registration sticker. This sticker was put on the vehicle by the inspector and was designed in such a way it was nigh impossible to remove without shredding to prevent sticker theft. (Yeah, that's a thing.) Rumor has it glass shops that specialized in windshield replacement had the ability to lift the sticker from one windshield to another but I honestly have no idea how.
In 2015 my state decided it would do away with inspection stickers, but not the inspections themselves. (Can't let go of that sweet sweet income that easily.) Now, you get an inspection right before you get your registration and you just have the one sticker on your car. Well, needless to say, 2015 was an absolute clusterfuck as everyone, including the inspection stations, tried to get a grasp on what was going on. And to be completely fair, the confusion was not all the customer's fault as the state hadn't really made much of an effort to explain everything, however, the transition was supposed to be simple; in 2015, you ignored your inspection sticker and came in for the inspection when your registration was due. Because if your inspection was due in April it would no longer be good when your registration was due in September. Yeah...the inspections are only good for ninety days from the expiration of your registration. So we had customer after customer come in for an inspection, we'd scrape off the old sticker, (no charge of course) and send them on their way until their registration was due.
Fast forward to the end of 2015 and a customer comes in because he tried to get his vehicle register and couldn't. The courthouse was telling him he'd never had his vehicle inspected. So he comes to us, already in a bad mood (because fuck the courthouse) and demands paperwork that says he has had his vehicle inspected and it passed. We, of course, are not about to give this without checking our records. And of course there is no record of us ever having inspected his vehicle this year. I explain the new system for him (because by this point it's so ingrained in my brain I feel I could successfully explain it to a particularly dull chimp) and explain that we're going to have to do a new inspection. He insists he came in earlier in the year and got an inspection. I explain how we lack a record of it, and even if we did have a record, if it was over ninety days old, we'd have to do it again anyways. And...
He leaves. Ok, cool! Reasonable, if somewhat understandably aggravated, customer. (Ha!)
I go about my business, but notice he was just hanging out in his car on his cell phone. Ok whatever, no big deal. He's probably just complaining to someone and letting off steam. (Double HA!)
And suddenly two cop cars pull into the shop.

Yeah. He had called the cops because "We had stolen his sticker". His half-a-year-expired sticker. In a state that was phasing out inspection stickers. For what nefarious purpose, I'll never know. But at least the cops were good humored enough to laugh in the guy's face.
As others have wished before me: may all your customers be sane!




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