Phone Jockey again, here to regale you with the tale of the ultimate Bridezilla...
Many moons ago an old high school friend of Mr. Jockey's was getting married to a lovely young...thing. This woman was nuts. She refused to come to Mr. Jockey's and my wedding as it was going to be, "A redneck affair." (It was, but that's not the point)
I am invited to not one, but FIVE bridal showers for this zilla and was expected to attend all of them with a gift. Nope, not happening lady. When I declined four of the five showers I was dis-invited from the one I was going to attend because I wasn't, "Being there for her." Mind you I wasn't in the wedding party, I was just attending the wedding as a guest.
About 2 months before the wedding I gave birth to my first child. The bride called me and indicated loudly that my offspring was not welcome at the wedding as it was HER day and she wanted nothing to compete for attention. Strike two.
Then the wedding invitations arrive with this little gem enclosed, "The bride respectfully asks all guests to dress in either Midnight Blue or Black, so as not to clash with the tablescapes." After I looked up the word tablescapes in the dictionary I lost it. Strike three.
I did not attend their wedding. Last I heard they divorced about 9 months later.