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Convenience Store Hell: Oatmeal!


4 CONVIENHELLFrom FishyGoRawrTalesFromRetail

The Background no one reads: I work in a large corporate-chain convenience store of sorts. We've got a big name, so I'll keep my stories confidential. I'm going on 3 years and I'm almost finished with school, so I've seen a lot of things during my time as a cashier. As I continue my remaining year here, I've decided to come out and log the crazy I will see from this point on. Here is my story:

Me, seeing a customer approach; "Hi, did you find everything alright?"

Customer, clearly agitated: "Yeah, yeah, whatever, it was great you had everything I need."

Me: "That's great to--"

C: "Listen, do you know a place that sells oatmeal?"

Me: "Oatmeal? Like regular--"

C: "Yeahyeahyeah, no sugar, no nothing."

Carolanne Argh 2Me: "Well we sell plain oats to make oat--"

C: "No, I need OATMEAL. OAT. MEAL."

At this point he's just screaming in my face different variations on how to say Oatmeal, my manager is now peeking over an aisle wondering wtf is going on. I flash an award winning cashier smile and go,

Me: "Okay sir, we sell plain oats for oatmeal. You make it yourself."


Me: "O...Kay, well there's a--"


Once he decided to just go back to screaming the word Oatmeal, I stood silently glaring at him till he left. To this day I have coworkers utter the word "oatmeal," whenever someone's a massive !@#$.





The customer was an ass, but plain oats is not the same as oatmeal you have to fully cook. Crushed, or cut oats are what you cook for oatmeal.


He was telling him "We don't sell that, this is your option that we do sell", and asshat was shrieking louder, as if that would make oatmeal magically appear...


That's when you say Oat? Meal? Oaat? Meaall? Sorry, doesn't ring a bell. What is this Oaat Meeall you speak of?


TV, I know! It's what you feed to oats.


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