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Monstrous Customers: For Half Of Your Life, I Wasn't Even Born Yet, Creeper


7 MonstrousFrom Ilia

I used to work in a bookstore in my early days of retail.

My conversations in retail fell into three categories; the script of the purchase, concerned well wishes if the weather was bad ("Drive safe, it's REALLY coming down out there!") and fending off creepers.

Third category on the day of this story.

I get greeted by General Dumb Creeper, a man who (according to his life story, as told to me over several days) supposedly attended Oxford, was in the US miliary, planned to go live in Syria, and born in 1952.

He starts right in on the endearments; quite literally "dear" at the end of every sentence.
He doesn't speak as if he had been college educated: simple dialogue, terrible vocabulary, etc. He was trying to sound smarter than he was, but at times he'd use the wrong word or phrase entirely; 'curry-luncheon' instead of "correlation," you get the idea.

I ask him not to use endearments with me, then he asks what "endearments" means. (Sigh and facepalm.)

I tell him that I do not want him calling me 'dear' or 'honey' or other terms of affection.

He acts all offended for all of five seconds, then is all, "But it's okay, dear. I came here to find my soulmate, and you seem pretty interesting. Where do you live?"

WTFOMFGNO! I'm a retail worker you freak! I'm nice because my job says I have to be!

And he's still using the endearments after I asked him not to. "Are you married, dear? Do you have any children, dear? I want lots of children."

I tell him that yes, I am married (lie, but he doesn't know that).

Him: "Oh, well I'm okay with someone looking to have an affair."

Me to headset: "Service Manager to registers please."

ILIA1Me to man: "You are being seriously creepy. And no, you're twice my age." I tell him point blank.

Him: "I don't know what to say, other than that age is only a number, dear. I'm sure you'll be okay with it after we date a while. Women like experienced men."

Oh look, there went the final straw. Maybe some people are okay with dating men/women twice their age, but if you're shoving it onto someone who isn't okay with it, you're a scumbag.

Me to headset: "Manager to registers! NOW!"

Me to man: "You don't respect me enough to honor the one request I've made of you so far, and you're not coming off at all like the well-educated person you claim to be. I'm not talking to you anymore, and I refuse to serve you."

He kept trying to chat me up and arguing that he really was educated, and how he would take me to Syria where I would live like a queen if I married him. (Are you stupid, or do you think I AM?)

I turned away from him and told the managers that this man was harassing me and that they needed to convince him not to come back.

He came back several times that week, until we got the police involved.




Misty Meanor

That ain't right, period. The fact the police had to get involved shows just how brazen he truly was.

Tech Support Survivor

*shudder* I don't know what I would have done. Definitely needed police. Not only can this guy not take a hint, he's downright crazy.


Glad that was the end of it. He sounds like the type to follow someone to their car and shove them in, all the while calling them dear. Just be safe out there,and don't hesitate to call the cops if need be

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