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Crazy Old Lady Calling: "I Don't have email. WHERE. ARE. MY WHITE. PANTS."


Custyhead3From dm-me-chickennuggets, Tales From Retail:

So for the last several months I’ve been working at a higher end women’s clothing store that has more of a mature clientele. I had my last week recently and when I got this phone call, I was just over it in general.

CAST: Me- Me Crazy old lady- COL

phone rings

ME: Hello and thank you for calling -store-! My name is Nugget, how can I help you?

Crazy Old Lady: Hi, I ordered some white pants from your store. When will they be delivered to my house?

Me: Alright, it will take me just one moment to pull that information up for you. If you can give me the order number that was emailed to you when you completed the purchase, I can look that up right away.

COL: I just need to know when my white pants are arriving.

ME: I understand, but I will need your order number in order to look up that information.


Me: I apologize ma’am, but I cannot look up your order status without an order number.

COL: (Clearly getting agitated with me) I just need to know where my white pants are!

Me: Okay, perhaps I can look up your order number if you provide me with your email address.

COL: I don’t have email. Where. Are. My. White. Pants.

Me: Ma’am, it is impossible to place an order without an email address. Without an email address or order number, there is nothing I can do for you, unfortunately.

COL: Well, you know my email address.

Me: ...I’m sorry, but I don’t.

COL: why NOT?!

Me: Because... I don’t know... you?


After that she just hung up on me. My boss was keeled over laughing during this entire exchange and I needed to hit my head on the wall for a minute.







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