Disneyland Hell: Dumbass Customer Invasion
From Mouse, Mastered, April, 2011
Okay, so, whoa. MouseMastered here, and today's the western movie of guests: the crazy, the stupid, and the spaced-y to talk about today.
First off, the Spaced:
I was over behind the tea cups and having a decently good time. A lady walked up, and asked me an innocently enough where Pirates of the Caribbean is. Okay, no problem.
So here's what follows:
MM: "No problem! It's over in Adventureland." *points towards Adventureland and is about
to say more when...*
SL(Spaced Lady):"Oh, so it's not in the Magic Kingdom?"
I was literally dumbfounded at that and merely responded "No ma'am, it's here. Adventureland is just another section of the park."
I don't remember if she had a first time visit button on, but I've seriously NEVER had someone think that Adventureland is not in the park.
Secondly... Let's go with the Stupid:
I'm at our stand that now sells chicken nuggets amongst other things and one of our new menu options is a kid's meal PBJ. The kid's meal comes with: two sides (grapes, apple slices, cookies, or jell-o) and a drink. OH, and a side note: we only sell potato chips, NOT FRENCH FRIES.
I had a couple come up and begin to order, two chicken nuggets, whatever. But then the Dumb Lady (DL) and her significant other add a PBJ to the order. Enter scene:
MM: "Okay, would you like the meal or the sandwich?"
DL: "The meal. Can I get that with fries?"
MM: "No ma'am. There aren't any fries. You get two sides: apples, grapes, cookie, or jell-o."
DL: "Okay." *ponders menu* "How about carrot cake?" *note: the cake and chips alone are listed directly beneath the PBJ*
MM: "No ma'am. You get two sides: apples, grapes, cookie, or jell-o."
DL: "OH! Two sides!" *my thoughts: about time you get it!* "Then can I get carrot cake and chips?"
MM: *HEADREGISTER* "No ma'am. Apples, grapes, cookie, or jell-o."
Seriously. THREE. GOD. DAMN. TIMES.
AND THEY WOUND UP CANCELING THEIR ORDER ANYWAY. FUCKING FUCK FUCKERS.
Also, I had some dude order, and he has change, but it's not enough to cover the change on the order. But he has a ten.
He asks me if I can cover his change from my till. He isn't going to get a mountain of change, so I say no and go to give him the change.
And I swear, he has aviators on and he gives me the BIGGEST FUCKING STINK EYE as I give him his bills and TWO COINS worth of change.
Seriously, why do some people act as if getting change is a sin against God/FSM/Lady Gaga? It's part of my job, as a cashier, to GET YOU QUICK CHANGE. Deal with it.
AND LASTLY, the GODDAMN CRAZY:
Thankfully this story did NOT happen to me, but the result is awesome, and the manager that this happens to deserves an RBA. (Note: They get one!)
It was at the nugget stand. One lady orders from this older guy. She gets the order, pays him, gets the change, all is well and good.
Well, obviously not, or I wouldn't be writing about it. She comes back, ranting and raving, that the cashier guy didn't give her the change.
Cashier guy, calmly, gets AwesomeManager, who comes by and does and audit on the spot.
The till comes out PERFECT TO THE PENNY.
End of story, right?
WRONG! THIS FUCKING LADY starts SCREAMING and SWEARING in the middle of fucking fantasyland that she didn't get her goddamn change and takes her water bottle and shakes it at CashierGuy and AwesomeManager, gets water everywhere, trashes the counter, and throws her water bottle to the ground and stomps out.
One of my supervisors wound up trailing her so that she could be found. Disney Security
showed up to the stand, I direct her to AwesomeManager, and the two disappear.
I wound up finding out that AwesomeManager and the security guard wound up EJECTING THAT CRAZY BITCH FROM THE MAGIC KINGDOM. She was escorted from property, and miraculously went along with it without much of a struggle.
All in all, it was an interesting spring break/pre-Easter week at the Kingdom. Summer's coming though, and from the looks of things, I'll be getting a LOT more stories to share.
Until next time, be safe, may your lines be free of crustys, and have a magical day!
--Mouse Mastered
read more Amusement Park Hell stories here
for more Dumbass Customers stories go here
and for more bitches like the one above checkout Bitch Encounters!
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