I've been in retail for almost three years now (working my way through school), and reading the horror stories on this blog makes me go, "Yup. Been there, dealt with that. Wow, that one's new." (Some are horror stories I hope to never live through, in any form.) Having read everyone else's hilarious tales, I figured I'd share my own.
I work at a Hallmark, and I was manning the registers one day when a customer came in with her twin Hell Spawn. The little demons were about five years old, and they very clearly did not want to be shopping with Mom at "the boring store". She was looking for a birthday card, and the first thing I heard her say to her little brats was "Don't touch anything."
Five minutes later (honestly, I'm surprised it took them that long), Hell Spawn #1 starts pulling cards off the runs. Mom doesn't even look up when she says, "If you don't behave, we're going home."
Naturally, this incites Hell Spawn #2 into joining his brother in taking cards down.
"If you don't behave, then we're going home."
It's like you could see the little hamster wheels turning in their heads over this revelation. They could do whatever they wanted, and Mom was just going to tell them to behave (because finding just the right card is so vitally important [/sarcasm]).
They took all the lollipops out of the display and threw them on the floor.
They pulled stuffed animals off the shelves.
They took two of the singing balloons and started whacking each other with them, having a sword fight.
They turned on our entire display of Halloween singing trees (40 mangled round robin versions of "The Addams Family).
And through it all, Mom just kept telling them, "If you don't behave, then we're going to leave."
My coworker and I were so busy with other customers that we could only run the occasional interference, rescuing things from destruction in the nick of time.
Meanwhile, completely oblivious Mom is browsing for 45 minutes, not even paying attention to her demon children.
Finally, she finds just the perfect card, pays for it, and leaves, without so much as an apology for her brats' behavior.
Although, considering the way she ignored them, I was wondering if that was good behavior on their part.
Which begs the question, what's their bad behavior like?
read more Hellspawn Tales here