Monstrous Customers: You're Lying



From u/justrudeandginger,  Tales From Retail:

So I work at a music store that sells all sorts of music gear but we also rent out band/orchestra instruments for the school year. They’re all due back on the same day, which is a few days after the last week of school.

We gave a grace period for late returns up until Independence Day... but as of today, there is a $10 late fee for people who failed to return on-time.

My coworker was dealing with a lady unhappy about her late fee and she asked to speak to a supervisor, so my coworker got me.

Lady: I can’t believe you’re charging a late fee! You’re clearly trying to squeeze money out of first-time parents. How could you only give us three days after school ends to return?

Me: Well, the instrument is ten days late- is there a reason why you couldn’t bring it back sooner? (Sometimes we waive the late fee at this point due to death in family, moving, etc)

Lady: well we went on vacation after that and then YOU were closed for 4th of July, so this was the soonest!

Me: I’m sorry, but I can’t help that you went on vacation and it was a National holiday yesterday. A few hundred people took care of the instrument either before or by the due date- they’re in situations just like you and we keep the due date close to the end of school to avoid people going on summer vacation and forgetting to return the instrument.

Lady: Prove it.

Me: I’m sorry?

Lady: I want proof that hundreds of people returned their instruments already.

Me: I’m sorry, but I can’t do that because the return slips have their personal information on it and I can’t show you other people’s information.

Lady: You’re lying and have no integrity. I have integrity and I’m going to shop at a store that values their customers and doesn’t extort them.

Me: I’m sorry, but you’re returning the instrument late even when you signed a contract agreeing to these terms. We also sent a reminder in the mail a few weeks ago so you can plan ahead.

Lady: Why is there a late fee when you’re not renting instruments out right now anyway?

Me: There’s a late fee because you’re late and we have around 500 rentals out right now. We rent for the summer as well as the school year.

Lady: You’re lying.

At this point I’m on the verge of crying because of her tone and how she’s talking down to me/treating me/etc. She said a few other awful things to me but I’m not going to go into full details for the sake of length.

I ring her up and I’m shaking from trying to keep it all in and then she gives me this line.

Lady: Hah, look at how much you’re shaking. That’s how I can tell you’re lying. I’m going to write bad reviews so every knows you and your store has no integrity.

TL;DR: Lady complains about a late fee when she’s late. Assumes she knows our inventory and accuses me of lying. Yells at me to the point of making me shake and then says she knows I’m lying because I’m shaking.

Anyway, I felt better after a quick cry in the break room. I also get to bask in the fact that our rental prices and any late fees are lower than our competitor and now she’s their problem.







Retail Hell Memories: Twilight Trouble


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From Malikissa, Tales From Retail:

When I was working at the CD/DVD store, it was frequently slow on weeknights, so one night I was sorting CD's to be put out on a cart at the front so I could greet customers. I had one other employee with me to help close and she was pre-cleaning because we liked to set records with how fast we could get out after closing.

A couple walk in around 15 minutes to close, and the guy storms away, yelling, "I'll be in the heavy metal section!"

The girl, of course, looks at me and for some reason thinks I am going to be her sympathetic psychologist. This is a terrible mistake on her part. I don't want to get involved with couple drama, and to be honest, assuming I am going to be on your side because I have boobs is really her first mistake. And my other problem is that sometimes, the thing in my head that tells me that I shouldn't say what I'm thinking, doesn't function.

So, she looks at me and explains that she just got her and her boyfriend matching Twilight rings, and he refused to wear his, and she was just super upset. And then she asked me what she could do to get him to wear his ring. And my brain stopped working. "If I was dating a guy that agreed to wear a matching Twilight ring with me, I'd dump him in a heartbeat for being lame."

The dude looks up from browsing metal CDs from across the store and yells, "Exactly!" The girl gives me a confused half smile, and I mumble something about the registers and flee to the back room. My employee winds up ringing them up and I slink out of the back room a few minutes later.

"I'm going to get fired. I'm so going to get fired."

She then started cracking up and pointed out that I'd only get fired if the girlfriend complained, and the dude was so amused that hopefully the girlfriend would forget about it. Fortunately, she didn't complain, so I managed to stay employed after that bit of stupidity.










Dumbass Customers: You want WHAT ???



From  FluffyTrainz, Tales From Retail:

I work in a musical intruments store.

A customer calls the store:

Cus:"I live 3 hours away and I'll be at your store tomorrow. Do you have a screen?"

Me:"A what?"

Cus:"A screen... a TV... to read music on."

Me:"... huh... no."

Cus:"Ok. How about a $50 guitar? Do you have those?"

Me:"Huh... no... guitars start around $150..."

Cus:"Come on, you must have a cheap guitar..."

Me:"I have Ukuleles at that price."

Cus:"A what ?"

Me:"A Ukulele. It's like a small guitar but with 4 strings."

Cus:"Oh... so a small bass."

Me:"No sir..."

Cus:"Can you plug them in a screen or TV?"

Me:"... what?"

Cus:"Can I plug them in a screen or TV to hear the sound?"

Me:".... no sir... if you'd like to amplify them, you have to buy one with a pickup, and if you'd like to have the sound come out of a TV, you would need some kind of audio interface..."

Cus:"Ok thanks."

-- CLICK --

Befuddled, I then tell my coworker who thinks I'm fucking with him, and right then the phone rings again, interrupting my story, I answer...

Me:"[MUSIC STORE NAME] hello ?"

Cus:"Do you have motor Oil?"

Me:"MOTOR OIL??? This is a music store!"

Cus:"You don't have oil? Like 10w30?"

-- FluffyTrainz







Telemarketer Gets telemarketed


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From FluffyTrainz, Tales From Retail:

I manage a music store. This happened 10 minutes ago.

I answer the phone... telemarketer. He will henceforth be identified as TM:

TM: Hello sir, are you the one in charge of telephone bills at your company?

Me: Oh oh oh... is this telemarketing ? This sounds a lot like telemarketing to me!

TM: ... yes sir. If I could just...

Me: ... this is your lucky day sir! Do you happen to play music?

TM: .... I do like listening to music.

Me: ... No, not LISTENING to music, do you actually PLAY a musical instrument?

TM: ... I play guitar.

Me: OH BOY! This is your LUCKY DAY! Sir, if you ever come to [MUSIC STORE NAME], You will get a rebate on ANYTHING you want to buy! Say for example, you want to buy a $6.00 pack of guitar strings, I will sell them to you for only $5.50! And if you want to buy 10 packs, I will sell them to you for only $5.00 a pack!

TM: ... I'm sorry sir, I have to go, I don't have a lot of time.

Me: No problem sir. And remember, you will always get an amazing deal at [MUSIC STORE NAME] !!!

*** click *







Dumbass Customers: Where are your guitars?



From  FluffyTrainz, Tales From Retail:

I manage a music store, and we just moved all the instruments to the new location. We're converting the old place into a service/used instruments/rentals place. We put on the wall in a huge poster the address to the new place.

Customer walks in: "I'm looking for a guitar"

Me: "The store moved, here's the new address (I tell him)"

Cus: "I want to look at your guitars"

Me: "They're gone to the new location. Look at the address on the wall (I point)"

Cus: "Where are your guitars?"

Me: "LOOK AT THE WALL ! ! ! (I point furiously)"

Cus: "I want to see the guitars!"

Me: "LOOK AT THE WALL ! ! !"

The customer leaves mumbling in a frustrated tone without once looking at the huge poster with the address.

He comes back 5 minutes later...

Cus: "I want to know where the guitars are"

Me: "LOOK AT THE WALL ! ! ! (I point)"

Cus: "You don't..."

Me, cutting him off: "Listen to me. Listen carefully. Stop talking and turn your head towards that wall I'm pointing at. NO. Don't talk. Look. Look over there"

He finally does, and sees the new address.

Cus: "Ah. Ok. Thank you"

And he leaves...

-- FluffyTrainz