What you can't see is the the word Sale scrawled across their chests with an ink pen.

 An Awesome Custy Story from Twink:

This is the type of parent I wish I had that always came through my line. It happened yesterday, and I had to take a long break to recover, but not in the way you might think.

A lady came through my line, with her two sons, I'd say their ages were around 9 & 11.  Internally I groan, because the cart is running over.  No sooner than the mom starts unloading everything, the younger one looks up at me and says "be right back". 

Mentally I'm thinking "uhh ok?", but I keep going, scanning in her items. 

While she's unloading, the older of the two starts whining about everything. 

He wants a magazine, then a candy bar, then a soft drink, then some of the matchbox cars. 

She says "no" firmly, twice. 

The third time he starts in, she rummages in the cart a second, and then approaches me with a belt in her hand. 

Instantly I can guess what's coming. "Ma'am, can you go ahead and scan this and hand it back?" she says.  I do, and then she doubles it in her hand.  Now I know what's coming.

She turns to the 11 year old and says, rather loudly, "Do you want me to wear your ass out right here in front of God and everybody?" 

He instantly shakes his head no.

"Then hush. One more word out of you, and you better hope the cashier is on your side, because I will do it, hear me?" she says. 

He nods his head.

It is then that the 9 year old reappears. 

Before the bag carousel has gotten full, this little angel has gone and gotten an empty cart, and is unloading the bags as soon as I turn the carousel to him with them. 

I could've cried! 

He even makes polite requests for certain items, such as "if you don't mind, could you please double bag the can goods? We live on the second floor and the bags don't always make it up the steps", and actually opened the empty bags after he'd pulled off the full ones!

I wanted to take him home!

Since mom has said no, but isn't paying him any attention, he decides to just start adding stuff to the cart that he wants.

She catches him, and takes the belt, that was lying on top of her purse, and makes good on her promise.  She holds on to him by his shirt collar, and in between swats, which are hard enough even I'm wincing, I hear "I said no, and I meant no". 

She clamps his hands down on the push handle of the cart the younger one is reloading.  "You move before I tell you to, and so help me you'll go to school this week standing up."

She doesn't have to use the belt anymore, but she does get in one final dig of punishment.

Right before I'm about to ring up the last few items, she comes over, and kisses the younger one on the top of the head, and I hear "You were such a big help today. Get yourself a Sprite and a bag of Funyuns." 

She looks up at the older one. 

"And if I even THINK you've tried to take them away from him before we get home, so help me, you'll be standing up for a week".

The reason I had to take a long break? 

It took me a while to get the "got what you deserved you little brat" expression off my face, and I didn't want a customer to think it was towards them.

Twink

I was walking down the streets of NYC on December 23rd and what do I see in the lobby of some office building? Killer Shopper Cart set up next to a Christmas Tree and presents. I went inside and talked to the security people. They had no clue why it was there and what it represented in the way of holiday decor. What ever the reason, this testosterone cart rules the aisle way and parking lot!

A Retail Balls Award goes to Self Scan Girl for how she dealt with a huge bitch Custy during the Christmas Rush:

Hi all, I'm your friendly neighborhood self scan girl.

Now, normally, I'm okay with this. I clean, I hold hands and babysit people who clearly need a lot of attention or are completely illiterate AND deaf at the same time, and I assist most times with a smile. (Unless you snap your fingers at me. Then all bets are off, bitch. I'm not your servant.) However, my first shift back, I get some bitch demanding some special attention that I don't have time for.

First, she uses the machines to check prices. So I have to void out all of these and write them up. She did this even after I a) specifically told her not to, and b) checked the prices for her on my palm pilot. Finally she stops. Okay.

Her: But the sign said four.

Me: Well, he just went and checked and it's actually twenty-seven.

Her: You can't do that.

Me: The tag for four dollars was for a completely different pot, one that was on clearance. I was down there not two hours ago.

Her: You can't do that. I saw a tag for four where I got this pot. The law says you have to give it to me for free now.

Me: That's only if the UPC code matches the tag. That tag you are talking about does not match this pot. I'm very sorry for the mixup.

Her: You're a stupid little whore. Don't know your own laws? This is a felony, bitch. I could report you to the police.

Me: Excuse me?