From phreakypalahniuk, TalesFromYourServer

It’s late Saturday afternoon, about 4:15, the sun is getting ready to set and I’m getting ready for the second half of my double. With only one other server on the floor the seating rotation is simple, so when a single older “gentleman” walks into the restaurant I’m the lucky waitress who gets to serve him.

Things are going fine at first, he’s a little demanding but that’s nothing we all haven’t had to deal with. The red flags start popping up when he starts calling me sweetheart and honey in a demeaning way.

I keep my distance just in case but then he says loudly “I’m deaf! You gotta stand close and lean in so I can hear you!”

This makes me uncomfortable but I understand that older people are sometimes hard of hearing. After my tenth trip to his table I’m positive he has everything he needs, ( wine, water, bread, butter, olive oil, Parmesan cheese to sprinkle onto everything, and salad) so naturally I think it’s okay to attend to the five top that was being sat.

I’ve got specials in my hands waiting for them all to sit down before I greet them.

The single man is probably thirty feet away from me, and as I’m taking drink orders for the five top I see him staring at me.

I think to myself, “He must have a question or need extra salad dressing. I’ll stop by after these drink orders.”

I finish taking the orders and look up at him, smile, nod my head and start walking his way. It’s probably been five to seven minutes since I was at his table, but apparently that was too long.

As I take my first step in his direction he turns slightly out of the booth and starts screaming “YOU'RE A HORRIBLE WAITRESS. I WANT A NEW WAITRESS. I'VE BEEN SIGNALING YOU FOR TEN MINUTES.” Ect.

I stand there frozen. My five top is a foot to my left and they’re all staring at me. The guy continues to yell and I finally remember I have feet and swiftly go and find my manager.

I didn’t return to the table, my manager packed the guys food up to go and asked him to leave. So what did this man need so urgently that sent him into this rage? More cherry tomatoes on his complimentary, pre entree, house salad.

The owner of my restaurant knows the man personally and ended up calling him on his home phone to basically chew him out for treating me that way.

--phreakypalahniuk

From  ilikeyourhair Tales From Your Server:

Nightmare 10 top from hell comes in around 11:45 for lunch. Mom and 6 year old, a birthday girl, and 7 other women.

Mom is very demanding, wants me to cater to her daughter constantly. Table constantly ordering rounds of complex cocktails (that of course all have something fancy on the rim). We dont have a bartender so i have to make it.

i had to stop taking tables becuase they were so demanding. whatever, theyre drinkers and celebrating im sure the tip will make up for me sacrificing half my section.

Mom leaves after 3 martinis and 2 entres, 60 dollar tab. 4 dollar tip. cool, whatever, still have 8 people left here so im sure it will even out to being worthwhile.

Woman on the other side of birthday girl has to run. I offer to grab her check really quick, she only ordered soup, i told her it was 4 bucks. She took out a 20 and said "the rest is for you, you did a great job."

Awwww! Nope. Birthday girl takes the 20 right in front of me and says "thats too fuckin much for soup. I'll use the rest to buy another drink."

um?

They all want their checks, lady tells me shell be paying for birthday girl. Birthday girl takes the 20 and says "i guess you dont need this afterall!" and puts it in her purse.

Woman who paid for her tipped me 10 bucks on the 100 dollar tab, i made about 20 bucks off the whole table.

The women started dancing around and scream laughing, kept me about an hour and a half past close.

stay classy ladies.

-- ilikeyourhair

From periodicstudier, TalesFromYourServer

I work at a restaurant in a province where the minimum wage has recently increased. When it's busy we have on a hostess, a bartender, a manager, and servers, but as the day slows down we cut down until there's only a bartender, manager, and a server or two. This particular Saturday wasn't too busy by 2:30 so we cut the hostess and all but 2 servers. Everything was going fine with a slight push at 3:15 but nothing that would have justified more staff. Or so I thought. Enter miss pleasant, or MP for short.

MP (as she's walking through the restaurant): excuse me! Do I seat myself or do I have to wait for you?

Me (dropping off food for another customer): oh hello! If you don't mind hanging on one second I'll be with you as soon as I'm finished up here.

MP: well I've been waiting and no one has come to seat me. (I should note I was out a minute earlier and she was not at the door)

Me: I'm sorry about that, but I'm here now, so let's get you seated! Pick the spot that makes you comfiest.

MP: Well, here is fine I guess. (the first seat in from the door that she has already walked past to yell at me, and of course it's in my section. Yay me)

Me: works for you, works for me. Now, welcome to restaurant. My name's periodicstudier and-

MP (interrupting me): -I just think it's ridiculous that I had to wait that long for a seat. Can you not afford to have a hostess on with this minimum wage increase?!

Me: I'm very sorry that you had to wait. We do have hostess on when it's busy but when it's slower they aren't as needed.

MP: Well clearly they were need since I had to wait so long for a seat. I shouldn't have to flag down a bartender or some waitress just to sit. You're a business, aren't you? You can only run if customers come in and order but having to wait makes me not want to stay. The minimum wage increase shouldn't affect the customers this much or you'll have none left.

Me: ... ok. Unfortunately when it's slower we do adjust the staffing levels to meet the demand. But now that you're here can I grab you something to drink?

MP proceeds to order wine, water, and lunch. She did apologize after having her meal and wine, but told me twice more how unimpressed she was and how an increased minimum wage doesn't mean we can be lazy and not welcome guests or understaff. After she left I mocked her in the back until my second shift started.

--periodicstudier

From  ShadyShadyShades, Tales From Your Server:

Customer orders 2

“2 what?”

2 guinness

“Pints or middies”

Pints

“So that’s 2 pints of Guinness?”

Yes

As I’m letting the the Guinness settle before finishing the second pour the customer notices signs for a lager on special.

I ordered Swan

“No you ordered Guinness, I repeated the order back to you and you said yes”

What can we do?

“You can pay for what you ordered”

Which he did

-- ShadyShadyShades

From SpencerPrattsCrystal, TalesFromYourServer

I had a horrible customer last night and just need to vent to people who will understand. I work at a restaurant in Southern Minnesota that is similar to Applebee's but just a little bit pricier. Most customers are decent ("Minnesota nice" and all) but last night, I served the King of all assholes.

It was a normal Monday night, not packed but not slow, when I noticed I was being sat with a man and who I presume was his wife and young daughter. Even from a distance, I noticed the scowl on the man's face immediately.

I approached the table and before I could say a word, he barked out "I'll have a Pina colada and make sure there is plenty of alcohol in it!"

Oh boy, let the games begin. "Certainly, sir. Would you like to make it a double?"

This suggestion seemed to insult the jackhole, because he practically spat out "No, I don't want to pay extra! Just make sure there is plenty of alcohol in it!"

The wife ordered a 22oz Bud Light with olives in it.

A few minutes pass and I bring the drinks to the table. Almost immediately, the man (not his wife) proclaims that there are not enough olives in his wife's beer. I go fetch some more olives, which remained untouched until I brought them back to the dish pit after their meal. When I return, the man tells me there isn't enough alcohol in his Pina colada and wants it remade. (Surprise!) They also order their food at this time. I put their orders in and bring the guy his new drink. He seems satisfied for the time being.

Between the time they placed their order and the time I brought out their food (maybe 15 minutes) the man flagged me down three times to bring extra things to their table, always barking it as a command and never acknowledging me when I dropped off his requests. At one point, he even interrupted me while I was taking another table's order to ask for another cherry for his drink.

Finally, their food comes out and I knew, in my heart of hearts, that he would complain about something. Sure enough, a couple of minutes after I set down his fajitas, which were literally sizzling, I hear him cling his knife on his glass. I look up from wiping a table and he beckons me over with his finger.

"These need to be taken back because they aren't hot enough. And I WILL need to speak to your manager tonight, because this has been unacceptable."

I bring his fajitas back to the kitchen and get my manager. She went and talked to him, and apparently, he was rude to her, too. She ended up bringing his new fajitas back to him to make sure he was satisfied.

At this point, I was dreading going back to the table, but I noticed his Pina colada was empty so I asked him if he wanted another one. "Yes, but get that other server [who just walked past] to make it because she knows how I like it."

The other server, who has never been a bartender and has also never seen this guy before, is stumped but goes and talks to him. Apparently, the first Pina colada "was too thin." Fine. She brings him another.

A few minutes later, while I was wiping a table close to his, I hear him complain to his wife that I'm incompetent. Awesome.

Much to my dismay, my manager made me offer this guy a free dessert. For some reason, he seemed pissed about this offer. "Bring a brownie sundae, I guess. Easy on the whip cream."

I bring it out and, OF COURSE, he is pissed that there isn't enough whip cream on it and wants me to remake it. I brought the stupid sundae back to the kitchen and immediately started crying. I feel stupid for cracking, but his guy just got to me so much. My manager ended up bringing the new sundae and the check (with the fajitas, one Pina colada, and dessert comped) to the table. He stiffed me, of course, but I didn't care at that point.

The weirdest part is that the whole time, his wife was polite and pretty pleasant. From what I saw, him and his wife never said a word to one another through the whole meal.

I understand that everyone has asshole customers once in a while, but this really got to me and is still bothering me this morning. It is really frustrating to work in a job where asshole behavior is rewarded. Sometimes I wish servers could leave Yelp reviews for customers. "Personality needs more cheese and less asshole."

If anyone has advice for how to shake off encounters like these, I would love to hear it. Thanks for listening!

--SpencerPrattsCrystal

From mynameisadrean, TalesFromYourServer

A woman walks in and she is already a little bit intoxicated. No big deal, I just thought I would keep an eye on her. She come up to the bar and tries to order a Long Island. When I ask to see her ID, she starts flipping out because she thinks it should be obvious that she is over 21.

"I'm sorry, but our policy is to ID anyone who appears to be under 30 years old"

"UNDER 30?! I'm 35 GOD DAMN YEARS OLD. I'M OLDER THAN YOU! HOW OLD ARE YOU, BITCH?"

"I'm old enough to deny you service, ma'am"

"DENY ME SERVICE? I'M 35! LOOK AT ME, LOOK AT THIS 35 YEAR OLD PUSSY!"

She then lifts her skirt and puts her foot up on the bar and shows me her "35 year old pussy". I'm not gonna lie, I've never not known how to handle a situation before, but I had no idea what to do. I squealed a little out of shock and repulsion, then asked her to put her vagina away while I found a manager to kick her out.

--mynameisadrean